A Public Diary

Where it all started

Ako si Mark, 29 years old... a young professional and currently in a long term relationship...

6 years na kung susumahin mga away bati... mga hiwalayan at balikan... yes, I am bisexual... easy go lucky kinda guy and only thinks about myself for the longest time...

We will get into these details soon enough but for now let's look back... early years of my existence and see if how I ended up like this...
some will find it amusing, some will find me petty and some might just shrug and just walk away... but if you can relate I can share a few thoughts of wisdom hahaha... (as if meron)

I'm the youngest, tatlo kaming magkakapatid... si Erick (eldest), Alice (Second) and me (yours truly). We are not that well off, but I can say na we get by... di naman maluho or masyadong marangya..

Elementary when i first had my first crush, kapatid ng classmate ko na si Lisa.. si Arnold... hmmm kuya nya to be exact... he was matured for our age... grade 6 ata ako nun... around 11 or 12?? (Sorry bad with numbers, I might be older estimate ko lang naman) but her kuya is around 16 na ata or 17...

Para syang local version ni Noa Centineo but a bit leaner and darker ng onti... he has a very nice smile and so manly... I guess dahil lumaki akong lampa masyado kong inaidol yung mga sobrang manly at maganda yunf buklt ng katawan...

To give you a short background... ako yung tipo ng bata na hindi pwedeng lumabas ng bahay pag tanghali kasi mainit.. bawal mapawisan at mag amoy araw kundi mapapagalitan ni mama... spoiled... yes.. very much... di man ako materialistic.. pero madalas ako nasusunod sa food... bfast, lunch at dinner ganyan...

Madalas nauutusan bumili sa tindahan, maghugas ng plato at kasama sa palengke... malaki ang gap namin ng mga kapatid ko... highschool na si ate ko pasimula palang akong elementary... so their circle of friends are not my type hahaha masyadong matanda para ayain maglaro...

At dahil sa age gap... I'm left alone pag pumasok na sila sa school with my mom kaya ayun... lumaki siguro ako tuloi na overprotective at mama's boy...

It even came to a point na pag tinatanong ako anong gusto ko pag laki...sasabihin ko na i want to be just like my mom... i pee like her... though i don't get it back then na magkaibang umihi ang babae at lalake...

Karamihan ng laruan ko lutulutuan... kasi since I am always with my mom... i get to watch her cook and prep the food on our table...

Literal na nakdungaw ako sa bintana watching my kapitbahay play around sa streets... medyo inggit pero kesa mapalo at mapagalitan madalas sleep nalang sa tanghali...

So going back to my first crush... halos malapit lang sa bahay namin naktira sila Lisa and meron silang piggery... so pag weekends at namamalengke kami ni mama... nakikita ko si Arnold on his maong shorts... with his lean abs... sun kissed skin at moist sa pawis... before di ko naiintindhan why i am getting excited twong nakikita ko sya... I just fond it weird... pero kahit kay mama hindi ko sinabi... akala ko kasi its just normal...

One time, umabsent ako kasi masama yung pakiramdam ko... Thursday and Friday absent ako... when i felt a little better Saturday Morning... pag labas ko sa sala kakababa lang nya ng phone... kausap pala nya so aling Tere (nanay ni Lisa and Arnold)

Mama: o dumaan ka kela Lisa, hiniram ko yung mga lecture notes nya... malapit na exams nyo humabol ka ng notes...

Me: (kamot ulo) Opo...

Pagdating ko sa labas ng gate nila nakita ko si Arnold na nagiimis na ng gamit sa piggery... basang basa sya and his tattered maong shorts shows na parang lumublob sya sa pool... he was taking a shower and i literally had my mouth open seeing how sexy he was...

Siguro na stun ako ng few minutes... and i was lost on the view... early morning view... when he noticed me... bigla syang ngumiti with those perfect smile and nagpagpag ng buhok... parang slowmotion lahat ng pangyayari with a sweet and slow music in my ears... drama...

(To be continued)   Sorry lapit nako office... i'll write more often... sa mga magbabasa hehehe