Redemption at Miller Mountain

Chapter 11

"It happened again, didn't it?" Faith asks Roger as a tear runs down her face. Roger knows now that she overheard him and the Doc talking earlier. "Yes, it happened again. But this time I hit back. I hope God will forgive me for that," he says. The sorrow and remorse in his voice is apparent to Faith.
     "Humph," declares Faith. "God doesn't care about us anyway. He only makes our lives miserable!"  Faith says harshly.
     Roger looks at her with his mouth agape, at a loss for words.  "Close you mouth, Roger. I can feel you looking at me with you mouth open," Faith states.
     Roger clears his throat, smiles, then says, "You're misguided, Faith! God does care about us. He doesn't make life miserable, only Satan does that!" he says calmly.  "Remember when we were baptized, how happy we were to be obeying the Gospel? That was only two years ago Faith. We can't blame God of this. Please, tell me you understand."
"I do understand! Roger, look at this from my point of view! Oh, wait! You cant, because I ... can't  ... see! So you can't see my point of view! God hates me that's..."
     Roger interrupts her midsentence, "What is wrong with you? You know God doesn't' hate you! Stop feeling sorry for yourself and listen to what you're saying!" He retorts back.
"Get out of my room, Roger! I'm not going to listen to what your preaching to me! I have better things to do!" she shouts!
"No, Faith! You can't get rid of me that easy! I'll leave your room, but I'll never give up on you, no matter what you say!"  LHe shouts back
"Out!!!"
     He storms out slamming the door behind him. He walks into the living room sits down dejectedly, his head in his hands, resting them on his knees, and prays.
     Jovial gets home looking tired and beaten.. He sees Roger praying and hears the young man's prayer.  Jovial bows his head and joins in the prayer. When Roger finishes, Jovial says "Amen" with him.. Roger looks up to see Jovial standing in front of him, looking mystified.
"What happened, son? From your prayer, I take it you and Faith argued?"
"You could say that, sir. She blames God for what's happening to her. We argued about that and the fact that she's wrong. I've been kicked out of her room," Roger tells Jovial with a faint smile that doesn't quite reach his eyes.
"Ah! I know all about that myself.  She and I've had that same discussion. It breaks my heart, her feeling that way. We just have to be patient and be good examples," he tells Roger.
     Roger nods in agreement, and starts spreading blankets out on the couch for his bed.
"Do you have any clothes, son?"
"No, sir. I barely made it out with what I'm wearing."
     Jovial takes off up the stairs and ten minutes later, comes back with some shorts, jeans, and a couple of shirts for him.
"Get you a shower and wear these until we can get your clothes."
"Thanks, Doc. I don't know what I'd do without you guys," Rogers says solemnly.
"You don't have to wonder, Roger,  we'll always be here for ya."
     With Roger off to shower, Jovial goes in to check on Faith. He knocks softly on the door and walks in. "What do you want now, Roger? I told you to get out!" Faith screeches.
"Hold up there, young lady! You need to settle down that there temper of yours. We're only trying to help you."
     Faith sighs heavily, then says, "I know Dad. I'm sorry for yelling and being so mean, but I have my views and that's the way I see it...or don't see...you know what I mean!"
"Yes, I understand you, Honey. But all we want is you to get better."
"Maybe in time I will, but for now this is my life."
"Do you need anything?"
"Well I need to go to the bathroom.  I couldn't ask Roger. I need Ms. Amy."
     Jovial walks out the door in search of Amy. He calls their home phone and Amy picks up right away, although she sounds groggy.  He tells her what Faith needs and she comes over right away. Amy helps Faith get dressed for bed, laying her down in a bed and tucking her in. Amy puts a phone beside the bed and pulls Faith's hand over to the end table for to feel the phone.
"Just hold the number one button for a couple of seconds and it will ring me. If you need anything, call me, not matter the time."
     Faith says thanks and closes her eyes, hoping the terrible nightmares will stay away. She doesn't see anything but her mom falling off her horse but never quite hitting the ground. Sleep is the only thing she needs right now, but that hasn't come easy lately. So tonight she tries again.
     Morning comes with the sound of birds chirping through the open window of Faith's room. The night was about what she expected, more darkness and less sleep. She feels for the table and takes hold of the phone, feeling for the buttons. She presses the one and holds it for a couple of seconds.  Amy picks up on the fifth ring as she struggles to get to the phone.
"Faith, Are you OK?"
"I need to go to the bathroom, Ms. Amy. I'm sorry for calling you."
"Nonsense girl. I'm here to help you. I'll be right there."
     Faith waits for Amy to come and hears voices coming form the living room. Her dad is telling Roger about the turn out of events the previous night for her mom.  "What a horrible person I am. I didn't even ask Dad about how it went. Just one more thing to add to the guilt train, God," She says to herself.
     Amy knocks gently on her door, comes in and takes care of Faith.
"Honey, do you have anything special you want to wear today for the um...?"
"There's a black dress in mom's closet that I'd like to wear. It's one of my mom's favorites. Or it was, I guess," Faith says softly.
"I'll be right back, Honey."
     Amy returns with a black dress that will go to just above Faith's ankles, very appropriate for the occasion. She gets Faith all dressed up, helping her with her hair and make up. Amy puts a small necklace around Faith's neck that bears a small gold cross hanging from it. Helping Faith into her wheelchair, Amy is exhausted, but wheels her into the kitchen where Jovial and Roger are waiting for her. Amy feels tired and worn out after helping Faith. She is just now realizing how much work it takes to do all that is necessary.
     They all greet each other and Roger feels Faith may not be mad at him anymore.
"You look beautiful, Faith," Roger says to her
"Thanks," Faith says softly.
"I made breakfast burritos this morning, I figured it would be easier for you to hold your food and eat, rather than have to fork everything," Jovial explains to Faith.
"Thank you, Dad. That does help."
"We'll be leaving in and hour for the funeral, so take your time eating, Honey."
     Faith nods her head after taking a bite of food. She realizes what a tough day it's going to be with everyone looking at her in this condition.
     This day is the beginning to the end of her mom in this world.