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5.00 AM. FEB 1st 2015.
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LEE TAEYONG

WHEELCHAIRS. For the love of god, why?

I can see the door, leading to an escape of reality. But now, I can not do it anymore. Looking at these videos of the choreographies my friends have sent me, it hurts that I can not join in, no matter how bad I want to move my body again.

I shut off my phone and put it in my pants' pocket. The darkness take over my vision as my eyelids cover my eyes.

"I am in agony." I whisper to myself.

I am currently on the wheelchair, in my hospital room, waiting for Mom to come. I lean my head back, just... thinking.

If I can never dance again, then I won't have anything to express myself through. If I won't have anything to express myself through, I would want to die.

Never have I dealt with so much pain in my life.

The pain of my bones being eaten by eager cancer. The pain of the fact that I can not dance anymore. The pain of the truth that my legs will have to be amputated soon.

I open my eyes, the brightness and the colors of the view I saw is starting to get back to my vision. I see my room in upside down.

I correct my position to see if Mom has come. Looking at the big glass on the door, nurses and doctors are the only ones that have been passing by.

Then soon, Mom comes in the view with Dad. I smile and chuckle a little bit. They come in with a pout on their lips.

"Aw, sweetie..." Mom hugs me and I hug her back.

"How are you, Mom?" I ask as we let go, looking at her with a gaze full of care and love.

"Not so good without you around. Your sister misses you. She's home with lots of work." Mom sits on the chair and Dad sits on the bed.

"How about you, son?" Dad asks.

"Not so good with the upcoming amputation." I shrug.

"Aw sweetie..."

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