The Art Of Seduction(Slowly Editing...)

His side... (9)

Jace POV

        Rose's eyes grew wide before she looked away from me.

        "How dare you say that to me after everything you put me through?" She spat.

        My heart dropped to the pit of my stomach and I fought back the tears. Men. Don't. Cry.

        "Rose please!" I called when she stood up to exit the coffee shop. She ignored me and continued on. I followed her out the door and chased her as she ran towards her car.

        "Jace, right now the last thing I want to do is talk to you. Please just leave me alone. I never want to see you again."

        It hurt to hear her say that to me, but I knew she didn't mean it. What we had was special and no amount of anger she has towards me can change that.

        She hopped in her car and sped off without even giving me a glance. I slammed my fist on the brick building in anger. I winced as the blood began to trickle down my arm. My knuckles started to sting and I began to question what I thought I'd gain from punching a wall.

        I was far to frustrated to realize how bad the pain was. That came much later. By the time reality set in I was already in my room listening to Three Days Grace and downing my third glass of whiskey.

        Not only did my hand start throbbing, but so did my heart. I was aching for Rose. I was suffocating for her attention, and starving with the need to wrap my arms around her waist and place small kisses along her shoulder. I hadn't felt this terribly in a long time.

        Of course the pain of losing Rose had always been terrible, knowing that I'd never have to see her again made the agonizing pain more bearable. But now that I'd seen her again and personally been told that she didn't want me anymore, I was lost. Before I would numb every craving I had for Rose by fooling around with any random chick, but right now the only thing that was close to numbing the pain I felt was a nice glass of Jack Daniels.

        

        I knew I needed to talk to Rose, explain to her why everything happened the way it did, but I knew she needed her space right now. Rose needed time alone so she could figure out how she felt about me. She probably hates me, and I can't blame her.

       

        That day that everything happened, could have easily been prevented if I would've shown up at Rose's house that afternoon. Instead I thought it'd be a lot more fun to hang with my friends; smoke a little pot and take a few shots. That's what we did. While I was wasting my life away, trying to be cool, my girlfriend was being raped and my baby was being killed.

        We we're supposed to go find out the sex that day. It was an important day for the both of us, and I ruined it. We were only freshman, but we were so in love, and we had so much support from Rose's family.

        My parents on the other hand, thought that we were dumb and that Rose should have had an abortion. I would have never let that happen though. Inside of Rose was a part of me. A part that I loved from the first moment I'd found out about it.

        

        My parents finally gave up in the end. I threatened to leave and never come back if they pushed the idea any longer. Not wanting to lose their only child, they stopped pushing, but they pretended as though the baby didn't exist.

        

        When I told them what happened to Rose they sent their condolences and shipped me on the first flight to California to live with my Aunt until they could move out here. They shipped me hundreds of miles away from Rose without even letting me say goodbye.

        Now every day I hurt just as Rose did. It was my baby too, and I had to deal with losing it the same way Rose did. The sad thing was that Rose had gotten, raped and brutally beaten and I couldn't be there to console her.

        

        Every night when I would dream about holding Rose in my arms, I'd wake up in cold sweats. For months after I left I didn't want to do anything but die. It took an ocean of Vodka and a sea of other things to deal with everything.

        Even now as I lay in bed and drink my sorrows away, I can't help but feel guilty. Guilty that I'd left her all alone, and guilty that I could've prevented this all.

        Rose was right. All of this was my fault. I deserved to rot in hell for everything that I did.

        Taking the bottle of whiskey to the head and swallowing the last of it, I passed out.

~~~~~~

So this chapter was depressing. I was listening to 'Thinking Bout You' by Frank Ocean so that might explain it.

More upbeat stuff in the next chapter.

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Next Update: Who the fudge knows :/

Yeah I know it's short, but I couldn't be bothered to write more. With the crazy updates you guys got this week, you can handle a few days without an update...

-Shahada