Waiting for Tomorrow

Chapter two: Julianna.

"Open it!" Mom smiled.

I took the tissue paper out of the bag and reached in. I pulled out an American Eagle gift card and AirPod Pros.

"Thank you so much!" I smiled. No part about that smile was fake.

Caleb handed me his gift. He's not the best gift-giver, so I was a bit worried.

I tore the wrapping paper off the box. White cardboard stared back at me. I took off the lid and looked inside. There was a blue sweatshirt and a pair of red high top converse.

"Thanks," I responded, smiling. Half the smile was fake.

The sweatshirt was ugly, but at least it was soft. I appreciated the shoes.

Hayley handed the camera to Caleb, then handed me her gift.

I smiled before even opening it. I quickly took out the tissue paper. In the small bag, I felt a card. I took it out. It was a fifty dollar Visa gift card, the ones that work like a debit card, and a little note.

Don't read this out loud lol. I got you a gift card so that Caleb can take us to the mall and we can shop together without mom.

I smiled at her and mouthed 'thank you'.

"What does the note say?" Mom asked, walking over.

I quickly shoved back in the bag.

"It says how much she loved me," I lied, smiling at Hayley the whole time. She smiled back.

"That's nice," Caleb smiled.

We decided to play some Nintendo Switch games for a while after that. We did a Mario Kart 8 tournament, which Caleb won, and by that time, it was around ten thirty at night.

We let the dogs go out in the backyard for one last time, then my mom went to bed. Caleb went to his room, probably to play Apex.

I had been sitting on my bed FaceTiming my friend Brennan, who had called wishing me a happy birthday, when I heard a knock on my door. I took one AirPod out and looked over my shoulder.

There was Hayley, standing in the doorway with a giant pink gift bag. She smiled shyly. I turned back to my computer.

"Uh, Brennan? I gotta go," I said quickly.

Brennan sighed. "Oh, okay, bye—" I ended the call.

"Hayley! I'm so exited!" I smiled, closing my laptop and moving it to the end of my bed.

She smiled and walked in, closing the door behind her. She sat the bag down on the floor.

"I wanted to present the gifts to you," she smiled.

I sat patiently, waiting for her. She pulled the first item out of the bag. I nearly gasped.

"I got you these because I know how self-conscious you are. Caleb let me use his amazon account so mom wouldn't know. I even got the package off the porch before mom saw it," she said proudly.

She handed me the pack of three sports bras. I tore off the tag connecting the set and looked at the one on top, which was pink with gray stitching. It seems like such a silly thing to want, but anything that'll make me feel more like the girl I am on the inside helps.

"Do you want to go try it on?" Hayley asked.

"Heck yeah!" I smiled.

I went into my bathroom and changed. I came back into my room beaming.

"I love it Haybug," I smiled, giving her a hug.

I nearly started tearing up, but I didn't want to start crying yet. I sat back down on the bed and Hayley pulled another item out of the bag. I smiled.

"I know how much you want your ears pierced, so I went ahead and got you a pair of earrings for when that day comes," she said, handing me a little box.

I took the top off and smiled brighter. Inside were a pair of cubic zirconia studs. They were silver and shaped like small hearts.

"I love them," I smiled. I felt tears fill my eyes, and this time I struggled harder to keep them from falling.

"And there's one more gift," she smiled.

I reached in and felt a medium-sized box. I pulled it out of the bag and opened it. Inside were two Bath and Body Works products, shower gel and body spray that were the scent A Million Wishes, and a bath bomb from Lush.

"Thanks Hay," I smiled.

"Actually, Caleb got you the bath bomb," she said.

"I'll go thank him in a minute," I said.

I hugged her so tightly and didn't let go for a while. Then, I headed to Caleb's room, Hayley tagging along. He was sitting at his desk with his headphones on. I hugged him from behind. He turned around, smiling.

"I love your gift," I said.

"Thanks. I knew you would," he said.

All of us settled down on the floor of his room and played Uno until it was almost midnight. I texted Brennan good night, then went to bed.

In about a month from now, so starting in 2021, I'll no longer be homeschooled. When we moved to this area, mom decided to have us go back to school so we could make new friends, and in addition to that, mom is starting to work again. The money dad left us and the money from our channel isn't going to be enough soon.

The thing I'm most worried about with public school isn't the fact that my family has a well-known name or just being the new kid, it's my self image, but not the self image you'd think. It's not the "oh, I can't do anything that'll make us lose subscribers", it's the fact I'm transgender. Hopefully the kids aren't transphobic once I do come out, and since we are in a suburb of LA, maybe they are liberal enough that they're accepting. Also, if anyone I can't trust finds out now, I'm screwed. It'll probably be the next thing trending on every social media there is, and the fact it'll be a rumor will make everything worse.