Brooklyn
I've been awake since last night and my eyes haven't left the plain white ceiling. My mind has stopped itself and is frozen in time. I blink a couple of times to tell myself that I'm awake and real. Numb. Yes, that's what I'm feeling. I feel nothing at all...just this dark void that isn't going to be filled anytime soon. I hear my alarm clock ring with a penetrating sound that makes me close my eyes in annoyance. It keeps on ringing and even though it feels like I'm going deaf because of how loud and close it is to me, I stay still and listen to it with my eyes closed for the first time in almost 24 hours. Almost. The deafening ringing of my alarm clock stops the train wreck of intrusive thoughts. I can't hear my demons anymore, I only hear this alarm clock singing with the worst melody to it. But it's my saviour. It killed the silence that let the monsters inside me take over my mind. Well, for now they're dead, they'll come back alive when this damn alarm clock stops ringing. I open my eyes again and turn the alarm clock off, but only because it's so loud that it might wake up all of the students here. In fact, most students already woke up and now they're all glaring at me. I look around this small room to see half of the students in here glaring at me or gaping at me with pity and sympathy in their eyes.
"It's time to get up, anyway." I mutter, answering everyone's question in this room even if they didn't say it with their mouths.
Why do you still have that alarm clock? It wakes us up every morning!
I can hear them complaining with the frowns etched to their faces and the tiredness and anger inflating in their lifeless eyes.
They don't say anything to me, even when they're really mad at me, they just leave me alone. I get the special treatment. Everyone in this boarding school knows what happened to me and that's why they try to avoid me and try to be nice. They pity me . . . I hate pity.
"Hey, blondie?" The sullen voice of Sonny makes me avert my gaze from the plain white tiled floor to his lifeless eyes. I don't reply and wait for him to go on. I've never talked to Sonny before and I wonder what he has to say to me. Maybe he's about to scold me for having an alarm clock? "Why do you still have that alarm clock? We've told you to throw it away like the thousandth time, now." He scolds. My prediction was right, like usual. I shrug my shoulders.
"My name is Brooklyn." I correct. Sonny's eyebrow perks up and his dark orbs gleam with pure amusement.
"I know."
I furrow my brows and slightly tilt my head at him with a puzzling look.
"You have blonde hair and your name is too long. So, Blondie is your nickname, if that's alright with you." Sonny adds with a slight smile on his face. I only gape at him with annoyance reflecting through my eyes but I don't really mind my nickname.
"Okay." I mutter, indicating that I'm fine with being called Blondie. Sonny chuckles quietly and then gets up from his bed and exits this small room with a yawn. My eyes trail after him and I too, leave this sad old room and follow him to the washroom.
"Hey, Curly." I call out as he's about to enter the washroom. He turns around and faces me.
"Curly?" He laughs and I feel my lips twitch upwards as I nod my head up and down.
"Fair enough, Blondie. Now, will ya let me take a leak?" Sonny questions with a hint of sarcasm laced in his words. I snicker quietly and then leave Sonny, emphasizing that, yes, he can take a piss, now.
I'm oddly smiling as I'm walking back to our room until everyone starts to walk past me towards the washroom. Then I realize that I have to go to the washroom, too.
***
"Blondie! Wait up!" Sonny calls out as I'm silently walking down the spiral staircase that leads to the first floor. I feel a smile creep it's way onto my face when the lingering smell of pancakes and syrup blesses my nose. I abruptly stop in my tracks when I feel a bony hand on my shoulder. I turn around and face Sonny. His jet black coloured curly hair is styled into a short side fringe that clearly highlights the contrast of Sonny's ghost pale coloured skin. I glance at his wrinkled uniform and unpolished shoes and grimace at him.
"Your shirt is wrinkled. Your shoes are unpolished. Your hair is the only clean thing about you. You will get in trouble, again. Yesterday, Mrs. Carol gave you after school chores and detention for not wearing a clean uniform for a whole week straight," I chide and then sniff him. "Why do you still smell so good?" I prompt.
Sonny quirks an eyebrow as pure amusement gleams in his eyes. I see a twinkle of mischief in his smug smirk and cross my arms across my chest while I accidentally bump my elbow into a senior's ribcage. He hisses in pain and looks like he wants to kill me but when his blue coloured eyes meet mine his scowl turns into a pitiful smile.
"Hey, Brooklyn. Next time, can you please be aware of your surroundings so you don't accidentally hit someone else in the ribs?" He inquires. He keeps glancing at his wrist watch as if he has to be somewhere in a short period of time. I take a slight step away from the senior boy and subtly nod my head.
"Yeah. Sorry about that."
He smiles politely. "No worries. See you around." He waves goodbye at me just before rushing down this staircase and budging in line for breakfast. I think he wants to get breakfast before the syrup runs out. I could say the same about me.
"Anyway, what makes you think why I smell so good even with my unclean uniform?" Sonny asks as he shoves his hands into his pants pocket. I chew on the inside of my cheek still thinking mostly about today's pancake breakfast. I don't think Sonny is that excited to eat pancakes. Maybe he doesn't like pancakes?
"I don't know." I finally answer. My mind is blank now. I just smell pancakes and I'm really craving it.
"I took a shower, that's why." Sonny remarks in a duh tone with a small laugh. I gulp down the humility I feel for not noticing Sonny's slightly wet fringe. I feel my cheeks and ears turn pink and stare at the stairsteps ashamed of my stupidity, once again.
"Right. I'm kind of dumb." I murmur and glance at Sonny's frown etched onto his face.
"I didn't mean to make you feel that way. I'm sorry. You're not stupid, brooklyn." He sincerely apologizes.
I sigh and shrug my shoulders. "I know you didn't mean to, but you don't have to lie to me. I know I'm stupid. That's what everyone says to me . . . " I walk away from Sonny's stunned figure and head into the cafeteria lineup. My sorrow is hidden behind my eager desire for pancakes and syrup.
