𝒪𝓃𝑒 𝐼𝓃 𝒜 𝑀𝒾𝓁𝓁𝒾𝑜𝓃

𝒫𝒶𝓈𝓉, 𝒫𝓇𝑒𝓈𝑒𝓃𝓉, 𝐹𝓊𝓉𝓊𝓇𝑒. 04

2 weeks had passed since that night, and I sat in the cemetery alone. I didn't know anyone. No one I knew was buried here. I like going to cemetery's to cry, I like to cry and let it out without feeling judge or having to give a explanation.

Sometimes I just want to die, I hate the stress I don't have the energy for it. I'm not depressed or anything it's just sometimes I feel like sleeping and never waking up. I have a lot of problems, I'm very complicated in a lot of ways.

I remember the days when I was just a kid no older then 13 when I would sit in my room and listen to my parents fight. I would always want to sleep and listen to sad songs which made me even sadder.

My parents were a happy couple they were, but after my brother died things changed. My mother grew cold distant, we always knew that she loved him like her angel. My brother was 22 when he died, me and my sister were only 17 my brother and I were close very close he was like my best friend.

When I lost him, I didn't know that I lost my mother too. Soon enough my mother and father began fighting, I use to hold my sister in my arms as we use to hide in a fort we made under our beds.

Every time me and my sister would talk to my mom she would always turn us away and tell us we weren't good enough not as good as him. Eventually me and my sister grew up and my mother grew worse, to the point of hurting herself.

She would sit in her room in front of a window in a rocking chair like a dead zombie from a game. Each day she would get worse, little by little she stopped talking, stopped eating, stopped doing everything.

One day I came home My sister and I were 18 at the time and we found our mother in the street standing there it was dark I had just gotten home from a late night with friends.

I walked up the familiar street to my house. It was dark and quiet so quiet you could hear a pin drop. I just got done hanging with Maya her house was just a couple streets down so i thought it best i just walked, i enjoyed the fresh air anyways.

I came to the front of my house, when suddenly I saw the gate open, no one ever left the gate open. I looked around to see my mother laying on the street ready to die.

A car came rushing down the road obviously not seeing her.

" MOM GET UP!!!!" That's when she turned her head to me and our eyes connected I saw pain and sadness.

At this point I was running toward her but it was like everything was in slow motion I couldn't get to her fast enough.

A few seconds earlier. I wasn't fast enough.

I got there but was hit by the car along with my mother. My body flew in the air as the impact of the car sent me flying into a ditch.

The branches had thorns. Lots of them. They tore open my neck along with my stomach was slit open very badly.

I laid there in the water it was cold and dark, it started to rain and thunder at the moment I accepted death.

But only I wasn't lucky enough to be blessed with death. No God gave me something much worse then death, I woke up in a hospital bed that day.

I came to find out not only had my mother died instantly but my stomach was so torn up when I rolled into the ditch that I couldn't bare a child.

It was nearly next to impossible I had a 1% chance of having children the other 99% was against me.

That day I fell into utter darkness into utter pain. I've made a lot of mistakes in my life after that I began to drink a lot and party and have lots of sex.

Eventually my sister left she couldn't take seeing me broken she left me and went to New York. My dad stood beside me but was mainly busy the only people to help were Carmen and Maya they were my family.

Eventually I got my shit together well most of my shit. My dad gave me a job as his financial advisor and it pays well so I accepted. My life turned around after my mother died for everyone my sister got more good at hiding her feelings as well did I. My father got his shit together and we moved to another side of Italy and became one of the most successful business men in Italy. My brother stayed dead of course but I would always miss him, I loved my dumbass brother Javier was my best friend I would never forget.

Okay guys this is a big turn from the independent badass bitch that she usually is but every girl has her demons and these are hers.

Cristina's been through some shit I will say that but I mainly decided to show her demons so early because I'm currently sad right now so don't judge me lol.

At first I wasn't sure if I was going to continue this story but then I saw 4 reads and I'm like I will right for those 4 READERS HOE this was a long authors note but it's whatever byeee now.