I can't help but look back. Look back to those days na fangirl palang ako. Yung mga days na I keep on waiting for their comeback. Those were one of my happiest days.
"Hoy! Ano? Sasama ka na ba saakin? You do know that at some point babalik ka sa Korea? We have our business there. Hindi pwedeng ako lang ang pupunta dun because you are the master mind of these all. Tinulungan lang kita sa capital." Veronica pulled me out of my daydreaming with her litanya. Ilang years na ang nagdaan pero magkasama parin kami. Even during my dark days she was with me an I love her for that.
"You know I can't go back there na." I told her as I fix my things.
"Anong you can't? We both know that you can but you don't want to. It's been 2 years, you have to move on. You were the one who left, besides malaki ang Korea, the possibility of seeing him is 0.01 percent!" I know that she's frustrated with me. For the last two years, she kept mum about the fiasco that happened pero ngayong nahaharap sa crisis yung pasty business namin, wala na siyang ginawa kundi pilitin ako.
"V, I know that you really need me to come pero walang maiiwan sa dalawa. You do know na ayaw na ayaw kong malayo sakanila." I said as I try to make her understand.
"You can take them you know. I have my house na there." The thought of going back to Korea with them scares me because of what happened years ago.
"I can but-" I can't finish my word because of my door opening and two little princes went in screaming.
"My my! My my!" I can't help but smile when I heard them calling me. It's a shame that I have to run away because of these precious gems. My precious gems.
"Mymy, I mishu. I ate cake! It's yum."
"Mymy, wuvyou." They kept on talking about what happened to them today. As I look at them I can't help but think of the what ifs of my life.
What if I didn't run away?
What if I told him?
What if I chose to be selfish?
So many what if's but none could be answered. Marami akong pinagsisisihan sa mga naging desisyon ko pero hinding-hindi ko pagsisisihan na nagkaanak ako. I love them so much that I am willing to give up my happiness.
"Very good pala ang babies ko. Can mymy have a kiss?" I asked because I missed them so much, kahit magkasama naman kami parati.
I didn't have to ask twice. They both gave me wet kiss na nagpangiti saakin.
"Thank You loves, Tita Mama and I will talk muna ha? You two behave, I love you." They nodded in response. May mga times talaga na ayaw nilang magsalita.
Hinarap ko na si Veronica kasi alam kong naiinis na siya saakin because of my excuses.
"Kim, like it or not sasama ka saakin. I never nagged you about anything pero I love VK Sweets so much." She said to me as she hold my hand as if she's pleading.
I took a deep breath and nodded. "Okay, sasama ako. Isasama ko ang kambal but please don't tell Haru okay? I don't want chaos for the twins. I will do everything para lang makaiwas sa gulo."
"I promise." She said and we both watched the twins as they whisper things to each other.
"You know, one look and they will know na anak niya iyang dalawang yan."
I looked at her and smiled. I have to agree. Walang namana saakin ang mga anak ko. Kulay lang ata ng mata. Lahat nakuha nila sa tatay nila, even the way they pout.
"Anyway, I have to go. Kailangan ko pang asikasuhin ang pinapagawa ni mommy, bye Kim. Bye twin Y. I love you." Veronica kissed my kids goodbye and went out the door.
"Mymy, saan punta si Tita Mama?" Yohann asked while still looking at the door.
"Balik po ba siya?" Si Yohamm naman ang nag tanong while slowly walking towards me.
Sinalubong ko siya and kinarga pabalik sa sofa kung saan nakaupo ang kakambal niya.
"May pupuntahan lang si Tita Mama pero she'll be back for us kasi aalis tayo." I need to tell them now para makapag prepare sila. I don't like keeping things from my kids.
"Saan tayo pupunta Mymy?" Si Yohann talaga ang matanong sa dalawa. While si Yohamm ang observant. It's like Yohamm is the one thinking and Yohann will voice out whatever is bothering his brother.
"Remember what I told you about your dad? Where he lives as of now?" I told them about their dad. Kahit naman hindi sila magkasama, I made sure na kilala siya ng mga anak niya kahit walang siyang idea na they exist.
Yohamm looked at me with his eyes wide and Yohann asked me with the question na nasa utak ni Yohamm. Twin's Telepathy I guess.
"So Mymy finally po, we will go Keryana po?" Natawa ako sa tanong ng anak ko. Hinaplos ko ang mukha niya and kissed Yohamm sa ulo.
"Yes baby pupunta tayong Korea but we won't me your father kasi he's busy. We will go there kasi Mymy will fix something okay?" They both nodded in response and they talked about the things that they will do once na pumunta na kami sa Korea.
I looked at them and swore that I will do my best to avoid him at any cost. To never let them see me or any of the twins because it will create a big change to each of our lives.
For Yohann Zeus and Yohamm Poseidon are our version of change.
