Friends.. Just friends. She repeats to herself.. That's all they ever were.. Friends. Both wishing to be more hoping for one day... A day that'll never come... She hopes this is all some nightmare.. That she will wake up and everything will be ok.. That everything will be back to normal. She never wanted to lose him but she did. Maybe if she had just kept her mouth shut they would still be best friends instead of back to strangers. Strangers... Months ago she would have never imagined that they would stop talking. That she would be back to being alone That the one person who promised to stay would be gone like all the rest. She knew this would happen.. Nobody ever stays.. She blames herself.. How could she be so foolish...
He sits there in silence seeing her from a distance. He misses her... He never wanted to lose her.. He had to let her go though.. He wishes to hold her close one more time. She meant everything to him and now she's just a distant memory.. Looking back now he wishes to go back to those times spent with her. Days of odd ball conversations.. Her drunken paragraphs that always seemed to make him smile. She always had a way of bringing a smile to his face even in the darkest of times. he looks at his phone. The picture of them still his lock screen. Tears now staining his cheeks.. How much he wishes he could go back to that moment...
Its the day after everything. She begins to go on a walk to try and clear her head.. She begins to cry as the memories of them together flood her mind. She misses it.. She misses him.. HIs smile.. His laugh.. His sense of humor... Everything.. Her phone vibrates.. She hopes its a message from him. Its not.. Its only her friend checking on her to make sure she's ok. She sends a quick text back saying she's ok.. Even though she's not.. She turns off her phone and continues her walk. Remembering when she walked the same path with him.. when he stopped her and hugged her to calm her down. where they laughed over some stupid jokes. Where they talked about numerous random things. She wants those moments back... She wants him back...
Laying in his room he stares at the ceiling holding back tears. He feels so lost.. All he can think about is her.. "why did I let her go" he thinks to himself.. Its so different without her.. He wants to call her and hear her voice just one more time.. Check up on her. He wonders how she's doing.. he wishes he could go back.. He wishes he could take everything back.. He needs her so badly.. He doesn't know what to do. The tears start to fall as it finally sets in that he's lost her for good.. He's lost the girl who meant everything to him.. The one who gave him joy even in the worst of moments.. He wants his best friend back so badly.. He just wants her back.. Nobody will ever be as great as her and he sees this but its to late.. He lost her and he can never take it back...
She's tired of crying over him.. She promised herself she would never get that close again but she did.. She trusted him... She believed him when he said he would never leave.. He lied... He lied to her and she believed these lies.. She cant believe she let herself become so foolish... He played her.. "He probably never cared" she thought to herself. She broke the one rule she made for herself and it left her broken again... She shoulda never trusted him.... She's starting now to wish that she never met him.. At least then she wouldn't be crying for days on end over him... She wonders what it would be like had she not met him....She gets a call... Its from him... She stares at her phone her heart racing... She lets it go to voicemail... She refused to let him lie again...
He tried to call her... It went to voicemail... The realization that he's lost her forever sinks in... How could he have been so foolish.... She's gone... He will never be able to get her back and its his own fault.. Why did he let her go.... He regrets it so much now that he's realized what he's truly lost... He tries to call her again... This time it didn't even ring... It went straight to her voicemail.. He hangs up the phone and puts it down on the nightstand... She's truly gone.... He begins to cry... He wont ever get his best friend back and that hurts... she was the only one who truly understood him.. And hes lost that for good...His chest hurts like someone grabbing his heart and squeezing it... He feels truly alone.... Shes gone...
