Lmfao Entertainment For You Guys

4/1/19

One thought I've always thought of at times late at night/early in the morning was on how i managed to pull through life and make it this far-- as a child everything and everyone seemed normal around me i even thought i was normal but at some point...i dont know what happened...its like-- all of a sudden my oh so perfect life or dream... Had shattered...i didn't know why..maybe it was them who betrayed me...maybe it was she who had left me all alone...maybe it was THEM who started it all...ruined my friendships..body shamed me...told me lies about others...denied me...disliked me...but for some damn reason...
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My idiotic child self never gave a fuck and ignored it..or maybe I was too naive..a fool...too gullible...yet i pulled through it all.. It all started in 4th grade..i keep telling myself i was too young but as i look back now...it seems so..normal..these days...yet i ignored it until 5th.. That's when i realized...that-- i had opened my eyes and saw the reality of back then AND today...it was horrifying..it got to me...now a two years or so im writing this..it got to me to the point where my oh so happy drawing had...meanings..behind them.. To the point to i use a code to plead for help...to be saved from this world...to be blinded once again...it was too much..i might be over thinking... Time from that...in my current grade i had..startes harming... And im ashamed...i dont want ro see anyone else like me... And im surprised by one thing.. My parents didn't make the effort to talk to me when i was upset or in need to be talked to...i had gotten away with self harm for almost a month now.. A full month.. Just 5 hours ago i was caught with a razor..my recent cuts remain healing...no matter what i am trying to stop..im already seeking help by teachers and staff at my school so im fine... My parents...its best they dont know yet..  Now i dont want anyone doing this too dont be a fool... You're loved..think twice before doing something you'll regret...
     --author