Ang Love Letter ng Torpe
June 5, 2011 at 11:23pm
Dear ( YOUR NAME HERE ),
Hi.
I miss you.
Sorry.
Sorry I had to say that I miss you. Sorry if I had to say sorry. It’s just that the thought of you has been eating up my thoughts and clouding my ideas the past couple of weeks.
I miss you a lot. I miss you just so much. I miss you like how a lonely dessert flower misses the heavy but subtle showers of rain, that slowly wipes the dust off it’s petals in dew or mist, in downpour or drops; but like the flower in the dessert, rain just does not happen.
I miss you like how a lost book in the far end of a college locker misses it’s reader, though slightly opened and seldom read, it pertains to a certain sense of belongingness that is unparalleled by any act of ownership that any ordinary reader can provide; but like the book, it is of no priority to find.
I miss you like moth which was once attracted to the glitter of the gone flame, captured by it’s glow, ignorant of the consequences brought about by the closing distance, is blinded by beauty that coats the pain and withholds the sorrow, but is driven by passion, drawn by attraction, and burned with interaction; but when the flame has gone, like the moth, it looks for another although already burned.
I just don’t know how to say this to you. How to address you in the situation we are currently in. . . I am currently in.
I love you.
Sorry.
Sorry I had to say that I love you. Sorry if I had to say sorry again. It’s just that my love for you has been piercing through my heart and draining all my life the past six weeks.
I regret never saying his to you when I had the chance. I know you were waiting for me to tell you, it showed in your eyes. You already knew how I felt, it already showed and I admit, I was afraid; afraid that we might have the wrong reasons for each other. Afraid that if I said “ I love you”…you might not answer me with an “I love you too”.
Remember the time you caught me mumbling to myself? I was rehearsing my lines, trying to pucker-up all my courage and strength, rehearsing the perfect phrases, clearing my throat, and trying not to look stupid, just to say :
“ ( YOUR WHOLE NAME HERE ) I Love You ”.
This might look egocentric for all the phrases begin with “I…”, but to tell you the truth of it all, you made the I in me whole again.
Actually you caught my attention the first time I saw you. The way you dressed, the way you walked (we both know this secret), the way you tried to smile but almost failed every time and just pouted instead, the way your eyes just spoke to me telling me how beautiful you are. The way this certain rainbow of colors just shattered every single colorless jigsaw puzzle piece of my heart and created a montage of images, words, and music holistically harmonized by the thought of you and I together…but I blew it.
Remember the first day we texted? It went on and on and on… We just never stopped messaging each other, it’s like giving me a personal tweet of what was happening within your radius and me giving you a personalized shout of what was I thinking about. Sweet.
We clicked at the very first moment we communicated.
Just to give you a big picture of how much I love you, it’s like love that is just love.
People have tried to encapsulate love in a word or a sentence, or even a note, but love is love right?
Love is like having a magic carpet ride atop the busy streets of Manila. Love is like having breakfast together. Love is like the sweet talks we had. Love is like a cold shower on a hot day. Love is like a warm shower on a cold evening. Love is like guiding your way around the metro. Love is like waiting for you to come out of the female comfort room. Love is like the sweet drinks we had. Love is like the chocolate cakes we shared. Love is like just staring at you. Love is like when you smile to me. Love is like when I hear you laugh. Love is like happily working together. Love is like you not answering your phone when with me. Love is like gelato. Love is like the taxi rides home. Love is like the first letter I gave to you. Love is like greeting each other “ Goodmorning! “. Love is like terms of endearment. Love is like profanity along Morayta. Love is like Love is like the weird kid along España. Love is like what we had in common. Love is like what made us different. Love is like walking along Luneta, together.
Love is like you.
I love you.
I love you even when your jaw gets the “Kilig-factor” every time you eat something sweet.
I kept on telling my friends that I didn’t love you, but at the end of the day, I really did. I really do.
Our concept of keeping ourselves blindsided to the fact of being romantically committed drove us to the point of personal-happiness-deprivation. I feel happy whenever we get to go out. I feel contented with you. It’s more of like a level of confidence for I know you love me for who I am for you know who I am, what I do, what I did and who I want to become. You give me a distinct sense of indestructible exuberance about life and how to live it…because I was living it for you.
Now the scenario is different. You have opened a chapter in your life that I wish I were in. If you only knew what I would do to be your damsel in distress ( for you were always the hero ). I have nothing against him. He is a good man, and he has my respect. You both entered a relationship, and you seem happy, I’m happy for you. I hope he can love you like I can.
I’m sorry I just had the guts to say this now. Not to count that it is in a letter, not even a personal expression of how I felt. How I feel.
Just so you know, I love you.
I just hope this is the dream you were looking for, your night sky filled with stars like when you were young.
I miss you a lot.
I love you…
Appreciate life more. Walk slower and notice the beauty around you.
( YOUR WHOLE NAME HERE ) I LOVE YOU.
My last love letter,
( MY NAME HERE )
