Forest of Ashes

Chapter One

This is my first go at fantasy/action so please comment and tell me how I can improve and make it better! Typos, character development, plot... correct me on anything and everything :)

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It was a damp, dreary, spring day, marking the festival of the second sun. Owen massaged his temples, regretting to decision to drink with his sister last night. Not that he had much of a choice. She did want to celebrate his birthday, the only one in the whole town who even remembered.

The slight patter of rain did little to relax him. In fact, since morning, something felt off. Whenever the bell rang— announcing a new customer— or a carriage thundered past outside, Owen jumped out of his skin. The market was on today, the whole town visiting the only bakery in Sanus to buy offerings for the sun god.

A scurrying crowd fought their way down the street. He gulped as he looked out of the small cracked window. Even his sister, Marie, wouldn't venture out there— and she was a Royal Guard. Today, she had wrangled her way out of duty, choosing to work in the bakery instead.

There were two things Owen hated: followings orders and talking to people. To him, Marie's choice seemed like trading one form of torture for another.

Working life just wasn't suited for him.

"Get me twelve rolls," Marie shouted with her back to him as she chatted with a customer. "The stag ones," She added.

She was at ease wherever she went and was always good with people, while he just seemed to make them nervous. It wasn't good for business, so Marie had given him the job of becoming her lackey. He didn't mind.

He handed the last of the rolls to her. They were shaped like a stag, which many believed to be the holy creature of the sun god. People had bought dozens at a time, hoping that by offering the God a piece of bread, he would gift them with a good harvest.

"Is that enough?"

The rattle of coins shook Owen out of his thoughts. Dazed, he looked down at the customer who had put two gold coins on the counter: ten times the price of the twelve rolls. Marie raised her eyebrows but didn't say a word as she took all the money. His sister saw her as fair game, and he would probably do the same in her shoes.

As the customer took the bread, Owen noticed that the top pocket of her blouse was stitched with a yellow thread. He had to pause to make out what was embroidered; it was so heavily detailed and hard to see from close up. She was his age, her skin tanned and her brown eyes alert, darting from Marie to the crowd when she thought she wasn't looking.

His sister stamped on his shoe, dragging Owen back to reality. He realised the customer had spoken again, her eyes narrowed in a way that knew he was in trouble. Instead of an apology, he said, "Nice shirt."

The girl laughed, making Owen wring his hands. Taking the rolls, she leaned across the counter. "Coming from a rich family does have its advantages."

Owen noticed the foreign accent- she wasn't from around here, even though her clothes said otherwise. She wore a charmeuse blouse and top, an expensive fabric which draped over the body and caught the light. Only the court of Sanus wore such finery.

Marie frowned. "Just makes our clothes look like rags, doesn't it?"

The girl bristled at her words; commoners didn't normally speak back. She was about to reply when Marie interrupted, a sickly sweet smile on her face, "Have a nice day."

Frowning, the girl bit down her words and left.

Marie turned to Owen and flicked his head. "Pretty girl, just too rich for the likes of us. Maybe next time, try someone else?"