The Backstage Pass (Camren)

Chapter 20

Sitting there in Lauren's arms was the best feeling on the planet. Her warm embrace, holding me tightly while the smell of her mint shampoo comforted me. Its hard to think that I was so guarded when it came to her. Had I known how amazing she could make me feel, I would've given in the second those eyes met mine.

We had moved away from the piano and had situated ourselves up against the wall, still up on stage. I was cuddled up into her side in a manner that I could almost guarantee I'd leave my body's imprint on her once we parted.

I was holding her tightly with my arms around her waist as she had one arm secured around my shoulder and the other was tracing very comforting circles on my thigh.

We had been sitting quietly like this for the last 20 minutes, and I was very thankful for having some comfort, without having to express my feelings. Well I was expressing one feeling right now; affection.

This whole situation is very tiring and a wear and tear on my mind but it only reminded me how much more I'm glad to have Lauren here with me right now. Lucky actually, I was lucky. She has a heart of gold and no matter how much I tried to push her away, she would only try harder to show how much she liked me. I didn't deserve her, but the fact that I have her now is amazing.

"You're thinking pretty hard there huh?" Lauren interrupts my thoughts. She was still rubbing my thigh soothingly and she stared at me with a slight smile.

"How could you tell?" I ask with a crack in my voice from the lack of using it after crying profusely.

"Well your eyebrows were knit together and your lips were formed into a flat line." She explains. "And your adorable little nose was a little scrunched up." She adds, lightly tapping the tip of my nose, making me scrunch it up. "Like that." She smiles down at me.

A small smile finds its way onto my face as I look into her hypnotizing eyes. This is the first time I've smiled since I left my house and it felt good having Lauren be the reason behind it.

"What's on your mind?" She asks softly. She wasn't demanding or pressuring, she was subtle, warm and loving. Her voice gave me chills, but also put my mind at ease.

"You." I blurt out. I feel my cheeks heat up in embarrassment but I have no way out of this so I just roll with it.

"Oh really now?" She raises an eyebrow. "And what are you thinking about me?" She asks in a very interested tone. I sigh as I contemplate her question. I know exactly what I was thinking but I don't really know what to say with my mind being the disastrous mess it is right now.

"Well, I was thinking about how safe I feel in your arms right now, how cuddling with you is probably one of my favorite things now, and how you're probably the only thing taking my mind off of its edge at the moment." I explain. I look up to see her eyes softening at my words. "I dunno. I just feel pretty fucking lucky to have someone care so much when all I've really done was treat you like shit-"

"You didn't treat me like shit." I raise my eyebrows, giving her a 'yeah right' look before she continues. "Seriously. So what you weren't falling all over me when we met? You are honestly one of the most genuine people I've met. You speak your mind. I like people who just say what they're thinking. That's why I refused to give up on you." She smirks. I feel a smile inching its way to my face as I take her hand in mine, intertwining our fingers.

"Yeah well, if I was so good at speaking my mind, you would've known how much I liked you way before earlier today." I quietly laugh.

"Oh I knew." She says quickly. I look at her and raise my eyebrows. "I could tell by the way you'd blush if I got close to you, or the way you'd stare at me when we had those little intense stare offs." She continues. "It was a matter of time before you cracked, it was all part of my plan to get you to fall for me." She jokes and I nudge her playfully.