The Truth About Camila (camren)

Chapter One

2

As soon as the interview had finished, I was quick to stand and escape the pressurising stares of my bandmates, running further ahead of the other girls into our tour bus. Tears are still leaking unemotionally down my flustered coloured cheeks and splashing vibrantly onto my trembling hands as I furiously try to wipe them away. As soon as I reach the cramped bathroom, I flick the lock switch and slide my back down against the door. My knees are brought protectively to my chest and I bury my face into my hands whilst loud sobs wreck through me.

A sharp pain erupted throughout my body and shattered every tough exterior I had previously fronted myself with. I finally let myself take a moment to release the overwhelming emotions that I had kept inside. It was all undeniably going to eventually come out to them; as well as being a close group, we were also best friends and told each other everything. They deserved to know the truth behind my constant freezing whenever our bodyguards touched me, or when they guy harmonizers came over to hug me. It was inevitably bound to happen sometime, but I was far too frightened and insecure to open up in this particular section of my life.

Harshly pounding fists vibrating loudly against the door brought me from my current torturous mind but I ignore it. I already have the knowledge that it is just the other girls, and to be honest I can't deal with any of them right now. They will pressurise me into spilling my distraught state to them, making me feel even more guilty for not opening up previously.

"Camila? Are you in there?" Ally's voice echoed through the door and Camila sighed. The shortest, but eldest, in the group always went out of her own way to ensure that everybody in the group consistently felt comfortable in any circumstance. She felt obliged to be the protector to the four of us since she was the eldest, but she enjoyed that. Genuinely, she is a sweetheart.

"Please come out babe, we're here to help you get through tough times." Dinah is my best friend. After the X factor, we grew immensely closer and practically are now joined at the hip. Wherever she goes, I go; wherever I go, she goes. It was now entirely natural for us to be surrounded with each other constantly and to be honest, this previous tour would have been hell without her by my side. She was highly entertaining, giving me the perfect distraction from my mind constantly drifting to my past.

"Mila, open up. We're worried." Normani was the gentle one with me. She is delicate and somehow understands without words how fragile I am. We are more intimate with one another, more affectionate. She's constantly questioning my feelings and if I don't want to say anything, she's content with just holding me silently. That's one thing I love about Normani; she doesn't push me and knows when she should just leave me by myself.

"Camzi, baby. Please I need to know that you're okay." Lauren. The relationship that I held with Lauren was unlikely to be described in the justified words. Whilst it's a known fact to basically everybody that we used to be much closer, the two of us still share a unique bond that was purely known as something that only soul mates are connected with. They understood every inch of one another wordlessly and the depth of their souls remained entirely explored by the captivity of their urge to know everything.

Their worry-filled voices flooded into my mind and I am slightly tempted to open the door for them. But, as usual, the terrifying memories and powering fears overcome me and horrifically find their way back into my head. I flinch while the memories replay consistently, unable to allow me the peacefulness of forgetting my past of what happened.

Flashback...

I shut my eyes heavily, squeezing them in an attempt to force back the unstoppable tears that are threatening to escape before regretfully looking up to find that mostly everybody located in the hallway were staring at me, the others who weren't were looking at the girl positioned above me whilst they anticipate what she is going to do next. My stomach curled with a fearfulness that wasn't entirely new, but still remained as frightful as the first time. I knew that I shouldn't allow this to repeatedly occur, but considering the consistency I was completely powerless the circumstance. I was pathetically weak and I highly doubt I could prevent the current abuse from happening.