Have you ever been in so much pain for so long that it warms you and you want that heat more and more until you become so accustomed to it that you can't even tell it hurts like it's a part of your soul that if you lose it you'll freeze and if you kill it you'll die...has that pain gotten so unbearable that even cutting or pills don't suffice like the only way to kill it is to kill you and you want it gone so badly that you actually die drowning yourself in the cold air and when it's over...there's nothing left of you or that warmth any longer
