The Accidental Summoning of a Nerd

Part 1

"Welcome Great Hero to our world! I am Grizald, one of the grand wizards of this land!" The wizard spread his arms wide, his golden robes reflecting the light from the hundreds of candles from around the room. His face was solemn and wise appearing, framed by long grey hair and beard. In one hand was a crooked wand, another a magical tome. It was a scene that could have come out of any fantasy book that I've read.

There was just one problem.

"Umm... Hi there."

I waved awkwardly, wincing as the triumphant expression was wiped off of the wizard's face. In the tense silence that followed, I scuffed my slippered foot against the floor, wishing I was in something a little more impressive than my ratty lime green bath robe and hot pink bunny slippers

He had not summoned a hero.

Instead, the wizard had summoned me.

"T-there seems to be a mistake." Grizald stuttered, looking me up and down with a mystified expression. "I was supposed to summon a legendary hero, the chosen one."

"Ah." I paused, looking around the candlelit room curiously. "And I assume I am not the person you were expecting."

"...ummm no." He held out a page from his grimoire. "This is what I thought I was getting."

I glanced at the page, unable to hold back a snort of laughter. "Oh. Oh no."

On the page was a drawing of a muscular man in bright shining armor, holding aloft a sword.

My shorter, rounder figure, clothed in a ragged cloth robe worn out from overuse... was not similar.

"I see..."

"..." The silence dragged between us, until I coughed uncomfortably.

"So can you send me home?"

"Unfortunately no." He frowned. "I don't even have enough power to summon another hero, much less try to develop a reversal spell."

Well this sucks.

"So I'm stuck here?"

"'stuck' seems like such a negative word..." He shrugged. "I feel partially responsible..."

I snorted, "FULLY responsible"

"Alright, fully responsible for your predicament. How about I give you some money and a voucher for a free night at an inn?" He held out some gold coins and a piece of paper.

I was not amused.

"Not only do I not have any idea how much money that is, what its worth, or how to use it in this society... I have no way to navigate around, and NO JOB."

The wizard took a few steps back, startled by my rage.

"A job?"

"Correction. I HAD a job. A shitty, low paying job, to be fair, several of them in fact... but at least I made enough... or close to enough to get by." I got increasingly depressed as I spoke. "But here... I have nothing, and I know no one EXCEPT FOR YOU."

I stepped closer, pointing a finger into his chest. "So you are going to do more than some cash and a lousy voucher."

"W-what can I do? I'm just a wizard!"

That gave me pause. "Just a wizard? What are you talking about? You can do magic!"

"Magic?" Grizald rolled his eyes. "Everyone can do that, we learn it in school as children. Most people find it boring. To actually make a career out of it? Not exactly the most popular choice."