Men of Love

Chapter 12

For lisili1

WARNING: SENSITIVE SUBJECT MENTIONED IN CHAPTER!! SKIP FLASHBACK IF UNCOMFORTABLE READING!!
XXXX
"Good morning Mrs. Hoying." I said in a cheerful tone when I came down stairs in the morning. Scott was still asleep in my bed.

"Morning Mitch. You look tired. Did you sleep well?" I felt a blush surface on the apple of my cheeks. Thank god she didn't notice I was wearing Scott's shirt.

"I slept fine. Thank you." I gladly accepted the coffee Mrs. Hoying gave me. "I'll wake up Scott when I-" I stopped mid sentence when I noticed a magazine on the table. I could see Scott and I's name. I pushed the other magazines off the one that caught my interest.

"That's fine."

"Can I borrow one of these magazines?"

"Yeah. Of course." I took the one I wanted and ran back up to my room. I threw the magazine at Scott's sleeping form.

"Ow!" He sat up and took the magazine in his hands.

"Read it." He looked at the cover and his face fell.

"Scott Hoying's secret love life with personal assistant Mitch Grassi." He closed his eyes. "Exclusive pictures inside."

"They have one from when we were in the pool, from your house, and from last night. They know I was reported missing!" I was chewing on my nails as I paced the length of the bed. The first picture was my first night as Scott's assistant when we were in the pool. The second was one of the random nights we spent together and we were silhouetted against the curtains. The last was last night. It was a perfectly zoomed in picture with my lips on his. They exposed our relationship, if you could even call it that. We never decided if we wanted to give each other the title of boyfriend. "Please say something Scott." He hadn't spoke for a whole five minutes. He threw the magazine to the ground.

"They know you're part of the Men of Love too." They had zoomed into a picture of just me. My necklace was the focus.

"Scott...."

"I think it's time for you to leave." It felt like the wind was knocked out of me. I had finally realized my feelings. I hadn't said anything but I realized what they were. This made my heart rip in two.

"Please no...."

"I'm sorry Mitch." He glanced up at me before returning back to staring at his lap. That one glance showed the tears that were building in his eyes. He got up from the bed and went towards the door. It was once he passed me that I decided to speak up.

"I'm in love with you." My back was turned to him and my eyes were set on the bed. Every time I blinked, tears would drag down my cheeks.

"I'll pay until you get a job." I punched him in the shoulder.

"I don't want your fucking money! I want you!" I could tell he was trying to stay calm.

"Please get out."

"So just like that? I'm another whore again?" He wasn't meeting my eyes. "You used me and you're done?"

"It's not like that." I laughed to cover up my sadness. It was a strained laugh.

"I would have so much respect for you if you just told me to fuck off instead of this bullshit!"

"Fine. Fuck off!" I couldn't help myself. I was blinded by red rage and I slapped him. I covered my mouth after I realized what I had done. I quickly pull on my clothes and I ran. Like every point in my life, I have to run. I ran to see my dad. I ran to get away from sexual abuse. I ran from my mother's disbelief. And I ran from Scott. A person I thought I could learn to be with.

"Kirstie?" My best friend answered the door and she brought me inside. They knew what was happening. Kirstie is an upcoming actor. She reads all the magazines. And Kevin has to listen to his girlfriend rant. They were both trying to comfort me. "Can I stay in my old room?"

"Yes. Of course."

"I'm going to go lay down." I was laying the bed. I can't believe Scott gave up that easily. I thought he liked me. I thought he was falling for me. I can't believe I forgot to give him his shirt back. It smelled like him.

I'm pathetic. I can't believe I thought I could have a normal life. I'm meant to be used. I broke my dad's promise. I can never fly far away. Because the thing that makes me unhappy is myself. I'm a whore. I'm meant to be used. I'm meant to wake up alone. I just wish that I could have stayed with Scott.

It's childish to think I could have been something more.

**********

"Did you have a good day at school?" I glanced up at Xander. He had a sly smirk on his face. I grabbed a knife off the counter.

"Go away!"

"Why are you such a troubled child Mitch?" I felt myself beginning to panic.

"Don't you-Don't!" He was slowly walking towards me.

"Is it because your dad didn't show you enough love?"

"Fuck you! Shut up!" I was holding the knife against my chest. I wasn't actually planning to use it but I was hoping he would take the threat of possibly being stabbed. "I said this was over. I can't keep doing this. She's my mom."

"It took you two years to say-"

"I've always fucking said it! I never wanted to be with you!" He was standing in front of me now.

"Then are you going to kill me? No one is going to believe it's self defense." Tears were building up in my eyes as the knife was taken out of my hands and placed on the counter.

"I love my mom." His fingers brushed through my hair.

"Yes. Be a good baby boy."

"Don't call me that you monster." He slammed me against the table. My cheek was pressed on the hard surface painfully. "Stop! She's going to be home soon."

"I'll call you in sick tomorrow." I yelped when his fingers twisted in my hair and pulled my head back. "Then we can spend all day together too." I closed my eyes as he did whatever he wanted. I had a test tomorrow. I couldn't miss it but Xander wouldn't listen to me argue.

"Mitch!" Xander finished right after my mom's voice signaled she was in the room. I felt disgusting. What I did to my mom....she didn't deserve this. She's been through so much already. Now this. I would let Xander take advantage of me for the rest of my life as long as I could take back that she saw us.

"Mom, I can explain." I made sure my pants were pulled up.

"You fucking whore!"

**********