Dear Diary

Chapter 3

Sitting on Ava's bed I was spaced out not listening to a word she was saying just staring at the photo on my phone. Well I was. Until she snapped it away "No! Uh uh! You are NOT sitting here feeling sorry for yourself! He didnt deserve you! He never did! So snap out of it!"

I just stared at her frowning down at me hands on her hips, I'm usually the one that shouts at her "why her?" I choked out, her expression softened as she climbed onto the bed beside me "I dunno hun. I really dont, you've always thought he was more than friends with her"
I scoffed "yeah and he made me believe I was imagining it and that I was jealous for no reason! I told her to stay away from him! Guess she got sick of me still being in the picture"

"Half the town is talking about it" she scrolled through her phone "let me guess the other half probably already knew?" I muttered clutching one of her teddies she stuck on some Netflix "yeah probably, you gonna be ok?"
"Yeah I'll be fine. Just sucks. You know he bitched at me about losing weight?I dont even need to lose that much! Few pounds at best! She's twice my size!" I wiped a tear off of my face
"He's a dickhead babe, you've always been way out of his league! He should've counted his blessings he had you in the first place" she rested her head on my shoulder I leaned mine on hers.

"I'd be lost without you you know?" She laughed "yeah I know. Look hun I know it sucks but think about it you really weren't happy for such a long time! This is a fresh start for you and tonight we are gonna go out and have some fun you're gonna let your hair down and go wild! You've already overcome so much in your life"
"Ava we are 3 years off 30! I'm supposed to be married with kids now! My own house, a good job! Instead I'm sitting here with my life in pieces! I thought he was my forever" more tears great wipe them away quick.

I had a plan, a life plan. When we were 15 Ava and I decided where we would be in 10 years time. We would both be married with 1 maybe 2 children a nice house, nice husband, good job maybe even a nice car. Instead I was sitting in my best friends room at the fresh age of 27 with absolutely nothing but battle scars to show for my life. By the time I  was 21 I had suffered 2 miscarriages 4 months apart. I've been cheated on a total of 3 times, I'd been taken for granted by people I thought were my friends. I'd almost died twice. Reckon if I can survive all that I can survive another heartbreak.

Jumping up from the bed I shook myself out "alright fuck it lets head out but I am getting totally and utterly smashed"
"YES!" Ava jumped up putting on music "ok we gotta have dinner first cause duh but after that its shots shots shots!"

Pity party is over. Its time to dress myself up and show this asshole what he is missing. Its party time!