...N-Nightmare?? (A Nightmare!Sans Story) [ON HOLD]

Chapter 5

Most of this probably won't make sense. I think I think I was half asleep when I wrote most of this, or at least the first part. It is supposed to be werid, and not entirely make sense.

Trigger warnings:

*voices (kinda)
*self hate
*self harm (?)

"Voices" will be in bold Nightmare's response will be in italics. Also be aware that the "voices" are not necessarily voices they are more like thoughts that Nightmare doesn't want to acknowledge and can't control. If that makes any sense they are thoughts he has about himself, however this does not mean that the thoughts are true. The voices could be described as loud thoughts, that are deep rooted insecurities, things that Nightmare doesn't want to and does not believe, but are always nagging and eating away at him. They are in a way doubt's about him and his self worth in a sense.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Nightmare's POV

They looked peaceful, safe with one another there. This is my family, I started to walk towards them. We could spend time together. Hang out, be like a real family. We could be happ-

You don't deserve it.

I stop in my tracks.

You'll make them uncomfortable.
Yes it is. You know that they are better off without you.
Your not helping them. You don't help anyone ever. You took them away from were they belong. You took them from their family and their friends.

Dam it.

Do you think that they are greatful for that. Your using them. And you know it.

I'm...I'm not. I wouldn't. .... At least not anymore....

Oh! So you admit I'm right. You are using them?

.......just....leave me alone....

(Don't expect that to be a regular thing now.)

"You okay dude?" I herd a voice call. I don't know how long I was standing there but it was long enough for them to notice me. Looking over the ware the voice came from I confirm that it is Dust speaking.

"Oh. I'm fine Dust. Why do you ask?"

Cross is the next one to speak. "Night. You've been standing there for 5 minutes. Are you sure your okay?"

As usual I force a smile "I'm fine. Everything's alright. No need to worry guys." They look at me, still worried.

This time Horror speaks "If you say so Night." I can tell from the sound of his voice that he doesn't believe me he's still skeptical, but doesn't want to cause a scene. He continues to talk "So... Are you just gonna stand there? Or what?"

"Well, I've been working since 6 in the morning, so I was thinking about just heading back to my room. You know? Get some rest." My words are met with confused and upset expressions. Its not a lie. I was tired, getting half an hour of sleep on average each day make you tired. I needed rest, but they unfortunately seem to have other plans.

Cross looks down, seemingly wanting to say something, but Horror speaks up.  "Yeah. But its just been awhile sense we've just hung out. So, we were just hoping you'd want to watch a movie with us?" Horror explains, indirectly asking me to join them.

"Sure," I sigh, "it's not like I need sleep or anything." I walk to the couch and sit down next to Horror, joining them for a movie. As Kumu jumps onto the couch, into Cross's lap and lays down, falling asleep. Poor guy he don't be able to move anymore. For the unspoken rule states that when a cat lays on you, you do not move, especially if the cat is sleeping.

~time skip~

Dust's POV (didn't expect that now did you)

After, 3 or 4 movies Nightmare starts to get quiet. And after another one he gets up and leaves. As he was leaving I noticed that his eye light was dimer and his eye was sort of glazed over. However, I seemed to be the only one to notice his absence. It wasn't uncommon for Nightmare to disappear for a short amount of time. But, as of late he's been locking himself in his room more and more for hours at a time, that doesn't sound bad but if someone doesn't ask him to leave his room he won't leave. A few weeks ago he locked himself in his room for 4 days. Its starting to make me worried but I don't want to worry the others about this. After all, it is probably nothing, he's been like this sense we've met.

(Sorry if that was weird, I tried to write that as more of a concerned family member then as Dust)

Nightmare's POV

I couldn't stop thinking. One minute I was as fine as I could be considering the situation, the next hopelessly spiraling into a pit of despair, and self hate. I felt as if I could break and start sobbing like a child any second. So, not wanting to cry in front of my fami- friends, I walked out of the living room, up the stairs, and into the hall. As I walked to my room, my body betrayed me. Walking became a sudden chore as a seemingly invisible force tried to bring me to the ground. It's as if my body became weak and frail, and gravity substantially increased. A sudden sense of panic hits me like a brick as I realize I've started crying. Now, as I was still in the hall anyone could walk in and see me. So, not wanting to alert anyone of my current state I power walk to my room.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I am so sorry that this has taken so long to finish. There is no excuse for that. This is the 4th version of this chapter. I was having a bit of writers block, so I came up with a few ideas and wrote a version of this chapter for each. And I had to decide what one to use. If you want me to use a different version then leave a comment telling me you want it changed. If enough of you want it changed then I'll change it.

I hope you all have an amazing day.