Dancing With The Demons

Dancing Alone

Name: Penelope Shirley
Perfered name: phee

Age: 14

Gender: Female

Family: One brother, her Mother and Father

Time in: 11:16

Time out:

Reason for visit: Tried to hide sleeping pills and knife in bed frame.

Duration of time already spent:
2 months

Time left:2 weeks
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The doctor walked in, they call me sick. I'm not sick, if I were sick I would be in a hospital not a psychiatric facility.

"Hello Penelope, why are you here again? I don't like seeing you now due to the circumstances, now tell me, what ended you up back here?"
I remained silent as the weight in my stomach grew.

"I can't help you if you don't talk to me." I looked up at the only man sitting across from me, he looked into my dull grey eyes. "Maybe I don't want your help, ever think about that? I was forcefully admitted, I never asked to be here" I whispered almost silently,

"Penelope you where brought here because people care about you and they where worried."

"They're full of shit, no one cares, not my parents and neither does my brother, no one give a fuck if I'm breathing so let me do them a favor and stop."
The weight in my stomach felt so heavy, as if every problem is just boiling inside me, unable to escape. I felt trapped, stuck in a box that I didn't deserve to be in like the kittens you see in the boxes on the street. I didn't do anything wrong so why am I here?

Something changed in the man's eyes, it was subtle but I noticed it, I think it was ... Sadness? What the hell? Why would this emotionless bastard give two shits about the words spewing from my mouth?
"Do you want to get better penelopy? Do you see a point?"

What kind of question is that? Oviously I don't want to feel like this anymore , that's a stupid question,"that's a stupid question, of course I don't want to feel like this anymore", "that's not what I asked, penelopy do you want to get better", he raised his voice, I flinched as so called 'fear' filled my heart, only visible through my eyes, I couldent care less about what was going on in the moment , only 2 more weeks left at this hell hole, I looked that bastard straight in the eye

"yes, I want to stop like this, I want to stop being like this" I let the fake years flow, only two more weeks of this bull crap and I'll be done, "let us help you" he stated , their all programed bots built to regergetate what's been burned into their brains , it's always the same lines 'let us help you' ,' it gets better', ' you'll be okay' and their all lying peices of shit.

After 2hrs too long I got to go back to my room, every patient lives on site for their stay and share a room with a stranger, I oviously am not a fan but they say it's to get us to socialize or some crap like that,

"Heeyy phee" Ave annoyingly slurred, Ave unfortunately is my roommate, I don't like him, even if I don't like him I do sort of feel bad for him in a way, she was admitted my her family because she came out as trans, they thought they could cure her and now she's here, her name is Avrey but we call her Ave, hes tolerable to say the least.

I flop into my bed if you can even call it that, it's a small cot with a thin blanket and flat pillow, but it's better than the floor, "hey, are you okay? I know that's a stupid question but, are you doing any worse?" I turn my head to the 'worried' Ave, " not at all, worse according to the doctor, I'm sick, and I don't want to get better the way they want me to, that's a problem in their eyes, and they can't see what I see", I may not be all best friend oo shiny glittery shit with Ave but where honest with each other ,

"any news from your family Ave?" , I added, he dosent hate them, he just wishes they could exsept him," not a word, they probably resent me, to be honest I'm seriously getting tired of waiting for them to want me, I am done giving a damn", what the hell? Something wrong ,something's very wrong, he loves his family, what happened ? "What happened ? I can tell there's something wrong" ,"... She stopped coming, Ashley stopped visiting, they won't tell me what happened but I think she's dead...", Ashley is his sister , she visited him every day , she stayed and cared when everyone else left

I heard the doctors talking earlier and they brought up Ashley, they spoke of her in a past tense , "poor girl", "she was lovely", " she can't find out", I dident think he'd catch on so fast, but the truth is , Ashley killed her self the night before , 'no one saw the sighs' , I call bull shit, she was depressed and no one cared , everyone saw what they wanted to and the problems that are too big to ignore are sent here, they killed her because they dident want to see the reality, his parents have lost their only child in their eyes, Ava dosent exsist, and now they have no children, but based on my knowledge from what I've heard and see, I think Ave will be leaving soon, her greiving parents will either be so desperate and bring him home , or they'll reget him even more blaming him for Ashley's death,

"Ave, your going to find out eventually but yes, Ashley killed herself, it's not because of you but of what everyone dident want to see", Ave's hard exspression softened as tears spilled out of his eyes, he looked up , "I knew you'd always give it to me straight , thank you phee"
I give him a small sympathetic look and sat up, I'm not stupid enough to hide my stuff in one place , but I don't know if they found everything else , I got up and bent down next to the leg of my bed frame , I felt around for the cover of the whole carved in the back , I pulled it open and felt for my "things", I lucked out and I felt that everything was still there, I got back up and headed to the restroom, removed my cloths , and stepped into the shower to wash away the guilt of today's events

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ okay so tell me what y'all think of this one, ik people liked my first one , also really sorry for the slow updates I'm trying to make the chapters longs and with less mistakes
Word count :1144