NOTE ** This memoir/poem is based on some thoughts and things that I've been through and still am in a way.Luckily I'm dealing with them and moving on. Please be gentle when critiquing it. I just hope someone can benefit from this. This is my first work on here as well so I hope you enjoy. my loves :) Follow me no twitter @swiftyfan16! **
being perfect isn't as easy as it looks.
it takes a heck of a lot out of you.
You always have to keep on smiling
keep on being friendly
keep on being nice
keep on throwing yourself into school to get your mind off yourself
keep on focusing on everyone else
keep on pretending like your barely keeping your head above water.
after awhile every inch of your life is affected
you try to be the perfect friend
the perfect student
the perfect son or daughter
the perfect you...
you start overanalyzing everything you say and do
you start planning out conversations with people your going to see just so you won't sound stupid
you start having meltdowns over not getting an A+++ on every assignment
you start thinking that maybe you should drop a few pounds so you can look as pretty in those jeans as those other girls do
you start thinking that maybe you should get contacts or have your teeth whitened so you fit in
you start staring in the mirror and picking at your thighs, at your stomach, at your nose, at anything
you start feeling like it's not okay to not be okay, like it's not okay being you
you start losing your grip and falling into the water
you feel like you can't breathe half the time and the other time you can't help, but almost bursting tears.
finally after all of this, someone grips your hand and starts to pull you up
you start to stop freaking out about not always getting a's on everything
you start to stop having to stare at yourself in the mirro
you start to stop being so afraid of who you are
you start not being okay
finally you start loving yourself....
** NOTE: I tried to kinda follow the process of what I've gone through. I know it's not the happiest, but I wanted to make it as real as possible. I feel we live in this world that is so obsessed with being perfect. I hope that at leaset person can be affected by this and realize that they don't have to be perfect. I tried to end it on a positive note. Please comment :) ***