Zero Universe

Nothing exists

She pulled the trigger. 

The string is torn. The noise shakes me to shiver. Crackle. She whispers something into my ear. No, she is screaming! But the cry vanished into oblivion. I do not see anything; it hurts to open my eyes, as if I look at the sun, and it melts me into atoms. It is difficult for me to understand whether I exist as if I took a sigh and still did not breathe out.

I heard the crackle of my bones — a new gesture, and I would crumble. I do not remember and do not know; I exist in the form of repeated thoughts, and then resurrect, then die. I do not feel either gravity or floating — just nothing. Reality does not exist; I float through space-time, dissecting matter with the remnants of my nature.

Somewhere in the distance, a star died, and I witnessed the birth of another black hole. It beckoned me, and I went to nothing. Plunging into the depths of space, I saw countless galaxies and universes revolving around me. I don't aim anywhere, and I don't go anywhere, I don't need anything and want nothing. Laws ceased to act, time stopped, gravity dissipated. Has the earth year passed? Or has one civilization changed another? However, I do not care. Invisible forces dragged me into a new reality.

Noise? Vibration! Shiver. Consciousness ... Something happened, and I again feel the time, the ground under me and ... dim light. Steps? Someone is approaching me and touching my forehead. A warm female held my cheek. She is MATERIAL. The sight was slowly returning.

"And what have we here?", there was a gentle female voice. "Come all here!" 

 I could barely see the three approaching silhouettes.

"Hmm, it looks like something alive. It looks terrible, and it is difficult to determine the form: the structure is broken, the tissues are torn, several bones are broken ..." 

She was interrupted." 

What are you discussing? What happened?" another one joined them.

"We have a guest."

"Guest?  I do not like your jokes"

"See yourself." I heard a loud sigh. He looked at me and was not happy with what he saw.

"Really" his voice was cold; I even listened to a shiver in him. 

 "Is it talking, moving, breathing?

"Did not check. His face is so funny as if thinking about something philosophical!", she laughed out loud.

"Better not to touch him. Or is it your handiwork? Are you all messed up again? Admit it!", with every word, his speech turned to a scream.

"Don't even look in my direction! Get rid of the body!"

"It is unacceptable. And I will not touch it."

"Did you forget who you are?", her eyebrows came together at the nose."You forgot about your destination. You forgot what was created for", he snorted but picked me up.

 I wonder what he was created for. Three men and two women. Do not get along with each other. They talk about strange things. But I do not care, I felt my body rising and again lost touch with reality, but I am still not sure that I was in it.

And again, a woman's hand touches my face. It was so good for me that I had the thought that I was in Paradise. But who was I that earned the right to be in such a place? I do not remember whether I existed at all. The tips of the hair of the mysterious woman were tickling my face. Our eyes met, and she smiled at me. I was lying on her lap; I was scared. I felt fear and attempted to rise, but my body seemed to betray me.

"Hush! Hush!", now she ran her hand through my hair. "You better not get up yet. Do not worry, my name is ..."

I did not hear, but I read her lips...

Maria

"What is your name? Do you have a name?" 

 I don't know. Or do not remember? What if it was in a past life, and now I am just nobody. I opened my mouth and waved my head.

"I'm sorry. But I will try to help you. I wonder if you are my creation"

"Maria!",  shouted one of the men.

"Yes?" 

"Do not talk too much. You know nothing about him, so think before you speak"

"I lacked your advice, Elios. It's so hard for me to live without them. I think you still have a   lot of work or should I remind you who made the most mistakes last month?", Elios snorted again.

Maria, Elios. I remembered.

"How do you feel now?", she looked at me again. "Please say something as soon as you can." 

I wanted to say something, but my lips were dry and chapped. I felt that I could say something, but the walls of my throat were as if covered with dry sand. I opened my mouth again, and she gasped.

"Water! For sure! How did I not guess!"

She gently removed my head from her lap and ran away to the other end of the room. But instead of the sound of pouring water or the squeak of wet glasses, I heard her fingers tapping the keyboard. I could not turn my neck to look around where I was at all. After a minute, my head was on her lap again, but she made me rise a little. Taking a few sips, I felt that I felt much better. As if she poured water into my throat, not life, but life itself. I squinted hard, blinked and took the glass from Maria's hands to finish the rest of the water. Vision finally returned to me.

"Thank you," was my first word. 

"Not at all," she took my glass and smiled. 

I stared at her; Maria turned out to be unusual, magical and alluring. Her brown hair covered her chest, which I was pleased to look at. I wanted to touch it, squeeze it in my hand ... I came to my senses when Maria stroked my cheek. 

 "Your wounds have not healed yet. Sleep",  at the same moment I fell asleep.

I dreamed of space again. I jumped from one gas cloud to another, the flap of my newly acquired wings accelerated me to the speed of light, and I jumped into another universe, which exploded due to a scream. But not mine. White color. Again only white is around: white walls, white floor, white nothing. My muscles shook painfully. Blood pulsed in my temples, it seems to me that this is not a dream, but another reality.

In the corner of this room was a girl, familiar and unfamiliar to me at the same time. I went to her, but no matter how much I walked, the distance between us did not decrease. I started to run, shouting something, but she did not answer; I knew that I needed precisely to her, that she knew all the answers. An invisible matted thread connected us, I was sure of that, but did not know why. No one answered me, and the girl did not move either. 

I knelt down and clutched at my head, massaging my temples.