Lost

Chapter 1: Hopeless Wanderer

P.o.v. The Lamb - Eve Colla

(Okay so I hate this chapter, it will change don't worry, if you don't like this chapter or like a part of it tell me in the comments so that I can change it. The second chapter is immediately better so please keep reading. Thank you!)

I am left to wander. Mary wants me to wander, says it's not good to be locked up constantly. So here I am. I would like to claim that after 7 years of living here, I know every nook and cranny. But I don't. Master changes the rooms and halls every year, not wanting me to memorize the layout. I wonder if it's one of his reasons when makes things go black, in hopes I will forget. It works, I can never memorize this place enough to use it to escape. I wish the darkness would make me forget everything. Maybe then there wouldn't be as much pain.

Some rooms are kept the same. My cell has never changed, besides the occasional flower Mary gives me. She says that it brings life into the room. I agree, the room is lifeless, it suits the person that lives in it. Though, I would rather enter into the dark again than tell her that. They are enjoyable, I don't want her to stop bringing them. They smell nice too, they remind me of my mother and her perfume.

When Mary visits me she puts them in my short hair, says it adds to my beauty. I don't know what illness she has, but her eyes are quite damaged. I was cute when I was a kid, like all kids are. But I'm not pretty. Not the me now or the me ever. Master and the guards say "I'm damaged goods". I can't help but agree. My hair was like my fathers, blond and a mess of curls. It was golden under the sun and poofed up even when it was wet. After that day though, patches of my head are burned, the hair won't grow back anymore. No matter what Mary tries, after my hair grows to my shoulders it gets messy and looks gross. Mary cuts it for me, it would look like my fathers without the burns.

The burns are everywhere. I have a lot on my arms from trying to block the flames. There's a burn on the front of my neck and down to the top of my chest. There is a slash on the back of my right leg. I bet there would probably be one on the left one if it was still there. My right hand is gone too. It was the fifth thing I lost that day. I have lost a lot, Mary tells me to ignore the nightmares and the memories. She knows that its easier said than done, so she doesn't like to leave me alone. But when she does, nothing stops them. I was there, then I lost things, and now I'm here. I walk around these halls. Mary has left for the day. She told me not to let my thoughts wander. Though, wandering is all that I can do here. So I do what I can with this life. A hopeless wanderer is who I am.

I am left to wander.