It seemed she had died. Cause death was standing right in front of her. He wasn't what she had imagined. He looked tired, not sleepy but like he was carrying the weight of the world on his shoulders. He was slouching and it looked like he were in pain. And so when he looked at her she smiled, and he stopped in his step, carefully watching her. She opened her mouth "before i go, can i ask you a question?" she asked him delicately. And death got all annoyed because he was expecting the regular "will it hurt" but the question stunned him.
"What do you remember?" she quietly wispered. He looked at her a new way this time. And he straightened his back a little, rolling his shoulders back. She almost saw a new person. She almost saw a person. Now when she watched him closer he looked brave and strong, like he had the strength of a thousand men, maybe he did. A thousand years ago he promised himself to never speak to anyone again. And he was ready to break this promise for the brownhaired, greeneyed girl standing in front of him. And so she reached out her hand towards death and he took it with twenty centuries of grace.
He sat down on the grass next to her. And she patiently waited for him to start talking. And he remembered everything, every person he had let walk through him. And so he told her how he was supposed to be stonecold and heartless. He was death; mean and horrible. He was the devil in everyones eyes. But he wasn't the devil. When he said that she took his hands in hers and held them tight. His eyes watered and in a few seconds a wave of tears went running down his pale weary face.
"Tell me about the beautiful moments" she watched him intensely. He took a deep breath and searched through his memories, and he smiled. His crooked teeth were bright yellow and she wondered how long it had been since he last smiled. But the sorrow in his eyes still remained and she knew in that moment how broken his heart was. And that he knew it was beyond fixible. He told her about all the old happy people with lovely stories, stories of how they found their soulmates, how they lived a rich and beautiful life full of love. And how they got to see their children grow up and have children of their own.
He told her about this one special woman, she had told him about all the beautiful things in life. And right before she walked through him she said she wasn't afraid, because she would finally be reunited with the love of her life. And she thanked him, that was the first time ever someone had thanked him. And he could not stop smiling.
She wondered how he had been able to stay sane all this time. The way he sat in the grass with his head down and shoulders tense told her all she needed to know. She was to afraid to even imagine what he had been through.
"Tell me about the worst parts" she looked carefully at him when he deeply sighted. He hesitated for a moment but then he told her everything. The first time a newborn had appeared at his feet, how he had begged for mercy and cried for days. The times hundred of people came at once, and he felt the pain of each and everyone of them. There were times when people who had killed themselves came, and he wished them happiness, wherever they were going next. There were a lot of regret. A lot. Murderers and victims came, some of them hollow and sad. And he told her how he died a little for every person walking through him. And there were times when he wanted to turn his feelings off, he knew how to do it but everytime he found a reason not to. And she caught herself wishing she was one of his reasons.
"I feel the pain of every person walking through me" he said, his voice trembling and hands shaking. "And i'm not sure how i have survived this long" he said looking up at her, her green eyes were glittering with sorrow; for him. And he told her he did not want her tears, he wanted her laughter, her big beautiful smile which healed him a little for every minute that went by.
"I belive the most beautiful thing about this place is all the unexpected people you meet, the ones that surprise you. Those who tell you things in ways you never thought were possible." she watched him in wonder. "I have met so many people, small, big, young, old, cruel, kind, hopeless, hopeful, sad, happy, confined, free, sick and healthy. But every one of them had one thing in common, they had all lived. Some of them for only a few seconds, most of them for a few decades. Some of them wanted to die and some did not. But none of them regretted living." his eyes met hers and it was almost like she could see him better, clearer.
With happiness flickering in his eyes he said "I don't think i will survive one more death," he looked up at the sky smiling and continued "and i'm fine with that." So they rose, he took her hand in his and togheter they walked into the light. And the thought struck him "you think it will hurt?" he asked her quietly, pain in his voice. But she shook her head and smiled "not even a little"
