The Book Of The Unchained

River I: Goodbye

          She panted heavily as she moved up and down, riding me like there was no tomorrow. We both knew that was true, which made this last encounter even more intense. It held passion in it, like Greek fire that no amount of water can extinguish. But underneath it all there was sadness. There was also a sense of desperation, like nothing was enough and it wasn't. I would give anything for this moment to last forever but I could not make that wish come true and neither could she. 

          I felt my climax coming and felt her tightening around me, like a velvet fist, then just like a breeze of fresh air in the stale summer heat, bliss washed over me. We stayed entangled for a while but we were only staving off the inevitable. I had to go back to my room and she had to go back to the dungeon. 

          She was the first one to move. Her hand caressed my face, her fingers lightly touching my skin almost like they were not even there. It felt so good I couldn't hold back the tears that welled up in my eyes.

"This is the only way" she reminded me gently but I knew she was reminding herself as well. 

          What creature in their right mind would want  to die. None. But it had to be done and there was no way around it. This was all my fault, I thought and she stood up abruptly, like she could not longer stand being close to me. As she neared the edge of the cliff, her skin glistened in the moonlight, her dark hair falling in waves over her shoulders making her look like a goddess descended from the sky to tempt me.

"You cannot carry the guilt, you know? I will not allow it. I was the one that made the mistake and now it's time to pay for it" she scolded as if she had read my mind.

"The only mistake you ever made was loving me and that's not even a metaphor, a figure of speech or any such thing. You are about to die and I am the sole reason for it." 

          I felt my voice cracking at the end and her head snapped my way like I had insulted her. She trotted towards me, my eyes following every graceful move of her curves and edges. Not that long ago I would have cursed her and her kind. Now I knew better but I was alone in my knowledge. If my people were made aware of my thoughts and opinions, they would execute me alongside her and I could not let that happen. So, all I could do was accept my fate and hers and try to move forward.

"Loving you was not a mistake!" She stated with such confidence, I could not dispute it. "I was rash and sloppy. Had I been more careful, this would not have gotten out of control and we would both be safe. Of the many things that I can do, changing the past is not one of them. "

She looked away, tears forming in her eyes as well, tears she obviously was trying to suppress. She turned back to me eventually, when her effort proved in vain and seemed a bit unsure. 

"I want...no, I need your forgiveness." she said softly.

"There is nothing to forgive." I reassured her.

"I am about to leave this world forever. You are the one that will be left behind to face the pain of loss. So yes, I need you to forgive me for hurting you." She pleaded with me.

"Alright. If forgiveness is what you need, then you are forgiven. Just know that in my eyes, you have done nothing wrong. You are perfect just the way you are and they will never be able to make me think any different".

          I pulled her in for a kiss, pouring every single drop of love I had for her in that one final gesture. She reacted with the same passion and intensity that nearly burned us both.

"It is time to leave" she whispered when we finally parted and there was nothing I could do but nod.

          We stood up and got dressed in the utmost silence. I almost spoke again but, honestly, what else was there left to say? She knew her fate and I was wondering, how was I going to find it in me to care about ruling my people, when my heart was about to perish along with her? Tears would not help fix the predicament but I could not stop them from falling no matter how hard I struggled. 

          And so, we left the edge of the cliff and quietly passed through the forest. When we reached the last few trees, she grabbed my hand and turned me to her. She place her palms on the sides of my face and stared into my eyes, her own glowing a bright fiery red, like molten lava.

"I love you more than life itself!" she told me and with one last kiss she was gone.

          She knew her way back as did I but my feet would not budge. There was this question that kept playing inside my head grounding me to the very spot I occupied: How could I?