Primrose Everdeen (if Katniss hadn't volunteered)

Chapter 1

“Primrose Everdeen,” said Effie.

I quickly glance around to see if anyone else heard that. I quickly pinched myself to see if I was awake. It was my first year at a reaping, and my name was only entered once (Katniss refused to let me put in any more.) Was it possible that my name, one out of thousands, could be chosen? Everyone is staring at me. It must have been my name. I tuck in my ducktail, as katniss calls it. I briskly walk up to the podium and look around. I can see mother letting clear tears fall down her pale face, and I see Katniss frozen with the obvious look of shock on her face. Gale. That is the only other person I can think of. I glance briefly at him. He has an expression mixed with shock, sadness, and something else I cannot place. Is it fear? I can’t tell how I am feeling. I am shocked most of all. I refuse myself to think of the days to come where me and 23 other tributes, people just like me will kill each other. Who will win? Certainly not me, I think to myself with the sudden sensation of sadness. Effie Trinket is blabbing on and on, and the only other thing I hear her say is, “Peeta Mellark.” He has a very shocked expression on his face. I know for a fact that he has other brothers, but they don’t volunteer, which I don’t think is fair, because they are older. Wait, I think, my older sister didn’t volunteer for me… I suddenly feel resentful towards Katniss, but I get over that feeling when I realize she has done so much for me over the years. The least I can do to repay her for those years of care is to die with dignity and somehow honor her. I decide that is what I will do.

I look one last time at district 12 because I knew in my in the back of my head that it will be the the last I will see my home. All the people I love here, and spent all my life growing up with will be lost forever because of the Capital. I turn abruptly and walk in our single file line, Effie leading the way, me in the middle, and Peta behind me. I know from years of watching this yearly event that we will be heading inside the Justice Building for our last goodbyes. I am lead by a peacekeeper to a small room with a leather couch that could probably feed two families for a whole year if it were to be sold. The first visitors I see are my family. Suddenly I thought of how many dead tributes had sat on this very couch before they were put in an arena and slaughtered, and so I decided not to sit down. Then my mom and sister came rushing through the doors as soon as I started to take in the rest of the room. Katniss came over crying, and I broke down and mimicked Katniss's actions. I cry for what seems like an eternity, and then Katniss and I both seem to remember our time constraints. She quickly wipes away her tears away, and I continue to copying her. She does not say anything she just removes her pin and puts it on the collar of my top and tucks in my tail once again. Then she just pulls me to the couch, sits me down, and just looks through my eyes into my soul. She can tell I am terrified and am struggling to stay in control of my body.

“Thank you,” I whisper in a voice that is almost mute.

“It will protect you. Keep it as your district token. I will be watching you, and know I will always be with you.” She lifts my chin until I am looking her straight in the eyes. “Please, try to win. Promise me,” she says in a powerful and commanding voice that makes me fear what she will do if I say no.

“I promise,” I respond, although I knew it is hopeless, and by the way Katniss is acting, I know she has hit this reality too. She never cries.

Without any warning, my mother pushes Katniss away and envelopes me in a tight squeeze that was more like a death grip than a hug. Then as abruptly as she had grabbed me she lets me go. She looks at me, but not exactly, more like she is staring past me into the distance.

“I am sorry,” mom says in a breathless voice.

That is all she says. I just stare at her with my mouth open. I cannot not tell if she is sad to my misfortune or if she is sorry for all those years of blankness after dad died. I cannot figure it out. Before I can say anything the peacekeeper comes in and dragged a screaming Katniss and silent mother from the room. I try to make the peacekeeper stop, but I know I have seen the last of my family, and as the door closes I feel like a door had closed between us that I knew can never be opened again.

Then another knock comes from the door. I can’t think of anyone else who would want to see me. Then Gale walks in and embraces me in a bear hug. He keeps saying he is sorry and how he should have volunteered for Peeta so he could help me. I dismiss his apologies and just assured him I will be fine.

“I will take care of them,” he says.

“Thank you,” I reply. I knew by them he meant my loved ones. “Tell Katniss I love her. Give this to her if I die in the arena.” From inside my pocket I produce a letter that I wrote to Katniss, and carried with me just incase I was selected to be a tribute. “Don’t give this to her until I am dead and the capital hovercraft has taken my body out of the arena. Promise me?”

“I promise.”

After that we sit in silence until the peacekeeper comes back and takes him away after we have a formal goodbye of hand shaking and a brief hug. Again I know that that door has closed between me and him, and even if I did see anyone again (which is unlikely), I will be different.

No one else comes. I feel very alone just waiting helplessly until the peacekeeper comes and shoves me roughly outside and into a car. I have never been into a car before. The car is filled with a peacekeeper driving, Effie in the passenger seat, our mentor, Haymitch, is in the backseat on the left hand side, Peeta in the middle, and me on the right side.

It is only a short ride to the train station where we board a fancy capital train, and that train will take us to the capital. I have never been to the capital, and the one advantage of being picked as a tribute is that I finally get to see the elaborate place that is always being televised. I have wanted to go there forever, but not for this reason.

I am assigned a room, and take a quick shower before I head down to dinner. The room is so fancy that at a press of a button I can get anything. The shower is also very different than what I am used to. At home we have to boil water to bathe, but on this train I can press a button and have an unlimited amount of hot water at my fingertips. Maybe I can get use to these changes.

I am the last to arrive at dinner. Effie, Haymitch, and Peeta were sitting a circular table. I sat down in between Haymitch and Peeta. I quickly gulped down my soup and nibbled on some bread. The soup was delicious.The best meal I had had in forever. Then looking at the faces at the others at the table I could tell something was wrong. I looked at Peeta for answers. He looked at me briefly, and then he looked at Effie who looked at Haymitch.

It was obvious I had interrupted something. I got up to excuse myself when Haymitch cleared his throat. I turned towards him and stared. He was always drunk, and tonight was no exception. His mouth was bubbling over with beer and you could smell his not so clean body stenching up the room.

The second he opened his mouth he let out alcoholic scented breath giving away that like always, he was drunk. “Where are you going little missy?” Haymitch said in such a teasing way my insides twisted.

“Leave her alone,” Peeta said in a stern voice.

“Ha, look who is defending his girlfriend.”

I clenched my teeth and walked out of the room. I was on my way to my room when I passed a control room where some peacekeepers were watching the reapings from the other districts. I went inside my room and closed the door. I sat down on the edge of my bed, and I let all the feelings from today run through me. Sadness that I was picked, confused why Peeta stood up for me at dinner because I never did anything to deserve his kindness. Most of all I was hurt. Hurt that I had to leave my family. Hurt that I was going to be forced to be killed for the capitals entertainment. Hurt that my life was going to end because of a war that happened way back into the past. I had already given up on any chance of winning, and I thought of myself as already dead. I hoped it would be quick for Katniss’s sake. I took off the dress mother had picked out for me for the reaping, and I folded it neatly on the chair and put on a nightgown that I found in one of the many draws. I looked at the big bed and then looked at the loveseat by the window and back again. I grabbed a pillow off the bed and a throw blanket off the chair and cuddled into a small ball on the loveseat. I closed my eyes and fell into the sea of unconsciousness, where I was sucked into a whirlpool of nightmares. I woke up suddenly screaming for my family (including my cat, Buttercup), and I heard somebody whispering in my ear that it would be fine. I looked up with runny eyes into the soft inviting eyes of Peeta. He was cradling me gently and stroking my hair. I leaned against him and cried myself back to sleep.