Ghosts of my Past (Paranoid Katsuki Bakugou)

1 - Goodbye, Deku... Hello, Deku?

Bakugou's POV
"Why don't you hope you'll be born with a Quirk in your next life, and take a swan dive off the building?" I joked, intimidating Deku. He looked at me with a horrified expression in his face, saying nothing. I walked out of the classroom, laughing as I left. The walk home was uneventful, aside from some people claiming All Might was in town.

At around 6 AM the next morning, I went downstairs to see my mother walking out the house, fully dressed. "Where are you going? It's early," I stated, looking at the clock. "I'm going to the Midoriya's house. Didn't you hear, Katsuki?" My mom looked at me. I looked back with a blank look. "Izuku committed suicide yesterday. It's been really hard on Inko, I'm going over to comfort her now." I felt my heart stop. Deku... did what? "What happened?" I asked. "Nobody knows. He was all alone, and he jumped from the highest floor of the building," Mom answered.

When I went to school later, Deku seemed to come up in every conversation. I couldn't avoid him. Our homeroom teacher hadn't heard what happened, and the class went quiet when he called on Deku for attendance. I felt a pit in my stomach the whole day. I never cared about Deku, why did this make me feel so upset?

You feel guilty, the voice in the back of my head said. I shut that voice out a long time ago. Now it was loud and echoed around in my otherwise empty head. The pit in my stomach was replaced with this weird churning feeling. I ignored it until I got home, then I ran upstairs and promptly threw up in the sink. The guilt is making you physically sick, the voice teased. "Shut your face," I said out loud.

I didn't go to his funeral. I couldn't stop thinking about the last words I had said to him, even after school had ended and I was training for the UA entrance exam. Deku wanted to get into UA so badly, don't you think it's unfair that you still have a chance to get in while he doesn't? The voice asked while I was practicing my explosions outside. "SHUT UP!!" I roared, producing an extra loud explosion. I clutched my stomach again. "Don't throw up," I told myself. I had only vomited once since the first time after Deku died. I couldn't control it, and I ended up on my knees, vomiting on the ground.

"Katsuki, I heard your explosions from the house. They're getting stronge- Katsuki?" My dad rushed over to me, putting his hand on my back while I threw up. "Dad, I keep thinking about Deku," I admitted, before I had a chance to think about it. He rubbed my back. "Katsuki, what happened to Izuku was terrible. I understand you're hurt. But don't blame yourself. It wasn't-" "It WAS my fault, Dad!" I choked out dryly. "I'm the one who got him so upset he jumped. I... I told him he should jump. I didn't think he'd do it, he was so determined and intent on being a hero, I didn't think he'd kill himself." I didn't remember having started crying, but Dad was wiping my tears and hugging me.

That night, the night before the entrance exam, I was startled awake by a quiet but deafening "Kacchan." I shot up out of bed and searched for the source of the noise. "It was just your imagination, calm down," I told myself. "You're not imagining, Kacchan," I whipped around to see Deku sitting in front of my desk. Once my eyes adjusted to the dark, I saw that he was very pale. The front of his shirt and pants was covered in blood mixed up with asphalt. His face, somehow, stayed the same. "Deku, what the hell are you doing here? You're dead, aren't you?" I asked, bewildered. I had to be dreaming. Maybe I was hallucinating.

"Ghosts are real, Kacchan. I got a lesson in ghosts and haunting once I died. Some people move on when they die, but vengeful spirits stay and haunt their killers," he said. "But you killed yourself. So what are you doing here?" I asked again. "You're the one who drove me to suicide," he said pointing a translucent finger in my direction. The nausea stirred in my stomach again. "I got about a month to wander around on my own, but now I have to haunt you. I stay in about half a mile radius of you, that's how this works. I have no choice." I shook my head. "That won't work. Don't you dare haunt me, Deku," I growled. "I have no choice, I just said that! I'm bound to you until you die. I'm not enthusiastic about it either, you know."

"So why aren't you in like, Heaven or Hell or Purgatory or whatever there is?" I demanded. Deku rolled his eyes. "You really need to pay attention, Kacchan. I can't move on, I'm stuck here. I don't even know if those places truly do exist or not because I can't leave," he explained. "You know what, I'm hallucinating. I'm going to go to bed, and forget about you, and place number one in the entrance exam," I stated determinedly. "Well, that's not very nice," Deku said, shrugging. I looked the other way and got back into bed.

"Kacchan, get up! You want to get into UA, right?" I heard that annoying high pitched voice first thing in the morning. So Deku really was a ghost. And I had to deal with him for the rest of my life.