gosh boys suck!

The guy I actually loved.

He was my world, my soul. He was the guy that actually made me happy. The guy who was truly amazing. I can't have him though.

We dated, we almost kissed on the fairis wheel. He was my forever & always. Now he's just some guy that doesn't talk to me. That hates me, yet he said he would never hate me cause I'm "amazing." Well it happened, sooner or later everyone comes to resent me.

I really trusted him. I gave him my everything, when I had nothing to give. My sun when it was raining. My spark when there was no fire. You get the point.

I loved him. I still do.

Yet he's moved on already. Or so they say. I want to say I don't care, but I do! And he broke me. Not just my,"heart" he broke me. And took a piece of me with him when he left my life.

I cry for no reason when our song comes on. Yet people still ask if we're dating still. And it brakes me a little more, every day. Cause when I have to say no. My heart drops into my stomach. And I can't think. I only think about the first time we ever held hands, or when he huged me in my backyard when it was three in the morning, and how when I looked into his big eyes he whispered in my ear and said he loved me, for the first time.

That's why I can't live without him. That's why I can't stand to think we're not going to get married some day.

Maybe in time we will get back together, I think that's what makes me feel safe. You know, thinking there's a chance. Nothing big just a little glimpse of hope. To help me sleep at night. Instead of crying.

  But maybe I'm just not worth it. All I know, is that he's was my world. And now my skys are broken, gray, and sad.

~livvy~