There Is No Happiness

Chapter 8

     The ride home is miserable, and all I want to do is throw myself from this carriage. I have been violated, and treated like trash. I am trash. I am just a piece of human waste, and I should be discarded of. How can I move on? How can I live like this? Knowing that I will never be innocent, that no man will ever want me but in a brothel? I'm on the verge of puking when the carriage stops. The coachman opens the door, and calls me "ma'am." I am no ma'am, or lady, or even human. I drag my body out of the carriage, then run up the long driveway to the front of the house. The Baroness is waiting up for me, with a smile on her face. She must be ready to hear all the amazing stories I'm about to tell her about all the grand people I met, danced with, and talked with. If Lady Tremaine recognized me, or if my step-sisters did.

     But with one look of my face, her whole presence changes. She sits forward on the edge of her rocking chair on her fine porch. "My dear, what happened? Why are you crying, and why are you all a screw?" I don't even have time to answer before I'm inside, taking off everything she's given me, putting it all away and running back home. How I dread this. I dunk my face in cold water and wipe off all the glamorous makeup with a washing rag near by. I may end up smelling like shit, but at least they won't be any the wiser. 12:15 already.

     I take a glance back at the Baroness and her home. She helped me with an escape, to feel free, but I came back not the least bit grateful. I'm going to have to apologize to her once I am able to compose myself. With a quick turn, I dash through the house and up to my room. I whip on a night gown of some sort and burry myself into my bed sheets.

     But I look down at my one foot, the one foot still holding one of the glass slippers. I take it off and hold it in front of me. The lines a curves that lace all the insides of the show glow, even though there is only the light of the moon coming in from my window. The shoe almost looks as if it could be a galaxy of some sort, or even possibly be apart of the stars. And I left one behind at the palace. Next to the ghastly man that gave me no choice, gave me no room to breathe. All he wanted was an easy going and he chose me.

     The whining of horse's echoing into my room startle me, and give me a sign that they are home. 12:30 exactly. I go to one of the loose floor boards and stuffs the shoe down in there, along with some clothe to cover it up. I rush back to bed as footsteps are heard climbing my staircase. The door swings wide open, the smell of alcohol fills the room, with a very odd stench of perfume.

     "You, girl. Are you awake?" I try not to move, so I can conceal the fact that I am awake listening to her every word. When she hears no response from me, her heels trail out of my room, and the door closes behind. I let out the sigh that I seemingly was holding in, and all the muscles in my body relax. I know I won't sleep tonight. But least I can be myself, here in my room. Isolated and away from the rest of the world. The moon shines in over my eyes, along with its fellow stars.

     How I wish I was among the stars, out of this despicable thing I can call a body. This no longer any kind of body. It is now just a vessel that holds me emotions, and my shame. With those final words, I burry my face into my pillow and ignore the rest of the night out.