Marvel's Resident Meme Squad

loki: "welp he called me mr loki so i guess i shall adopt him now"

Peter should have seen it coming.

Really, Loki was the (self-proclaimed) "God of Mischief", after all. Peter wasn't quite too sure about the 'God' part (there was no way that Loki and Thor were actual gods right? They're just aliens. Beings from outer space with crazy powers and super strength and the ability to defy all scientific reason and logic...ok maybe they were gods-), but the 'mischief'?

Definitely.

At least, Peter had found that much out himself when he'd walked into the Avengers Compound for a meeting with Mr Stark, only to literally do a double take when he walked into what was basically an arachnophobic nightmare: an Aphonopelma Johnnycashi tarantula the size of a Labrador casually lounging upon one of the plush leather sofas in the waiting room- and was that a magazine and a mug on the table?

If Peter had been a less spider-y man, be probably would have screamed right about then.

...okay, maybe he screamed a little.

The spider let out what he believed to be the arachnid equivalent of a laugh, and begun to morph, legs shrinking, and losing hair, turning creamy white, until it had gone, and in it's place was-

Peter gaped.

Loki- The Loki, was right here, in front of him! Both fear and awe fought tooth and nail inside him to present themselves, with awe taking champion (as it always did), as his mouth flew open, stars glittering in his eyes.

"No freaking way, that's so- so cool! How did you- I can't even believe, I- woah!" He finished eloquently, mouth half-closing in a dumbstruck smile.

Loki -Mr Loki?- merely smiled, amusement written over his face.

Loki was pleasantly surprised to find someone who's first reaction to him was awe, instead of fear or anger or 'ahswear ta god ya little shet if ah find ye en mah lawn again-'.

"Hello," he greeted. "I knew the man of iron recruits young, and to me, everyone on this realm is young, but aren't you still..." he rose a brow," a child?"

Peter flushed red, pouting slightly, "hey I'm not a kid," he whined. "I just have a baby face, ok?"

Loki chuckled. "I jest."

"Besides," Peter continued, feeling the need to defend himself, "I can take care of myself! I'm Spiderman! Uh- you've heard of me, right?"

"Of course," Loki nodded. "Why else do you think I took on that form?"

Uh- Peter didn't quite think that constituted a warm welcome, but who knows, maybe Asgardians were just weird. He thought back to the time Thor had tried to offer him some beer at Tony's welcoming party...

"Aw, you did that for me?" He asked, fiddling with the straps on his backpack. "Gee, thanks, Mr Loki."

Loki blinked in surprise. It had been...a while since someone had bothered to adress him with any kind of honourable title. People usually tended to replace the 'Mr', with, 'Damn you-'.

"It's no problem, little spider. I heard you were awaiting a meeting with Stark and thought I'd keep you company in the meantime."

"Was that really the only reason?"

"Well...", Loki's smiled turned wolfish, and he gestured to an unconcious body next to him on the floor, of...was that the Falcon?

"It's always a pleasure to terrify the Avengers and co out of their wits."

Huh...you'd think Peter would have noticed him lying there when he first walked in.

"Is...is he gonna be ok?"

"Bah, he'll be fine," Loki waved. "How was I to know he was arachnophobic?" He paused, tapping his chin. "Actually, no, I did know he was arachnophobic. That's exactly why I did it," he grinned.

Peter chuckled slightly nervously. "Haha...yeah-"

A female voice sounded from above. "Peter, Mr Stark is ready to see you now."

"Oh, I guess I uh- gotta go," Peter smiled. "It was nice meeting you Mr Loki, you're actually uh...not that scary in real life." He blanched, hoping he hadn't offended the other. "Not that you aren't scary! You're really scary! But, uh- not in the bad way? I mean, uh, um-"

Loki shook his head and laughed softly. "It was a pleasure meeting you as well, little spider. I do hope we shall see each other soon."

He walked over to the table and picked up a mug, inspecting its contents closely.

"Oh dear," he murmured.

"What's wrong?"

Loko sighed, and in the most monotone voice, went,

"This bitch empty...yeet-!"

And disappeared into thin air.

-

The door to Tony's office opened, by the very man himself. Tony was not happy. He was the guy who had doors opened for him, not the other way around.

"Peter? Kid? Helloooo? It's been 10 minutes, aren't you coming i- woah! Are...are you okay?"

Tony waved a hand in front of the dumbstruck teen's face.

"Pete, c'mon buddy, talk to me! Peter!"

Meanwhile, far away, Loki was giggling as he opened up his phone and opened up the reddit homepage.