To the guy who once loved me back,
Hey, this was the first word that comes to my mind when i started this one, trully, i don't know what to say. I miss you a lot and i don't know if you still feel the same way. When you left, i thought it was the end of our story, you still talk to me and we still managed to work out the friendship. But as time went by we parted and go on with our own ways. I tried all the possible ways to avoid you and i'm so thankfull that i did it for fucking 4 years. No communication and not seeing each other was the two possible ways for me to moved on. In that 4 years time, i already learned to keep going on my own. I became independent, living alone. At first, i know it was hard but i don't have a choice but to keep going. Time helps me make my life easier. it helps me build stronger, thicker and taller walls that the worth it could only cross. But one day, with just one hello of yours, my world became upside down again. The walls that i built became fragile and suddenly crashed. All this time, i discovered that i'm still the broken girl who can't move on from the past and i'm just faking myself. I am not expecting for a status but you made me feel loved or am i just being stupid. The late night outs and the weekend galas means so much to me. The smile on your face gives me energy to face to reality or maybe my fantasy. those silly jokes of yours which brings back the smile in my face and your words of wisdom that gives power for me to battle everyday struggles. I would forever be gratefull for that. But as fast as i fall the faster you left. I once ask you if we can still work things out but you answered me with a blurry, because you now have a special someone and you can't directly tell me. Go on pursue her, but can you please tell it directly to me? Don't give me falls hope. I can understand.I can't really forgive myself that i didn't make it on your special ceremony, trust me i really wanted to go. But maybe it's gods way of telling me that i should stop sacrificing for you. That it's time for me to love myself first. To trust with his perfect timing and for the right person.
Ps. Siezed your day. Stay strong. Always ask for the guidance of the lord. Whatever challenges you encounter please don't give up. Think of your inspirations. Always thought that you have many people behind your back waiting for your victory!
Pps. You always have a special place here💙 and i'm still waiting for your clear answers.
-the girl who was left behind
YOU ARE READING
Mr. Guitarist
PoetryLove. Everyone are very fond of these word or feeling I guest? But what everyone didn't know about these was it can be somebody's worst nightmare. It's a feeling that others want to forget.
