Intention of Insanity: Nagisa x Kayano Fanfiction

Chapter One

Nagisa grasped his pencil tighly, knuckles gradually turning white. Today was the day that he would confess to Kayano. As if punctuating his thoughts, the bell promptly rang and he rose from his seat. He pushed in his chair almost frantically, rushing to the doorway. It was the last day of school before summer vacation, and this was his last chance to tell his dearest Kayano how he truly felt about her. Upon seeing the striking forest green of Kayano's hair within the crowd, he hastened his stride. 

"K-Kayano-san...!" He spoke softly, almost pleadingly.

"Nagisa-kun, what is it?" She inquired. A soft smile adorned a beautiful face framed by dazzling emerald hair. The girl in front of him radiated geniality, so unlike the vicious creature that had been concealed inside of her for the past year.

"I... can I talk to you? P-privately?" Nagisa glanced away, a light blush dusting his cheeks.

"Okay... We can go outside the school?" Kayano's vivid orange eyes narrowed slightly, as if trying to see through him. Did she have an inkling as to his motives? He drove the thoughts away, knowing that rumination would bring him no good.

"Y-yeah..." Nagisa slotted himself in beside her, matching her pace. He fiddled with his hands, his gaze fixed on the floor. They walked in silence, which only served to exacerbate Nagisa's anxiety. They arrived outside the school after a painful eternity, and Kayano moved to face him. 

"So... what did you want to talk about?" Kayano probed. Nagisa hesitated, slightly shuffling away from her. He attempted to steady himself and brought his eyes to meet hers.

"I... I l-like you." Nagisa's breathing bordered on hyperventilation. Kayano took a step back in startlement. There was a pregnant pause, and then:

"...I'm so sorry, Nagisa. I only think of you as a friend." Kayano too brought her stare to the floor. Her cheeks were tinted pink, but this was not an indication of romantic feelings. This was embarrassment. Nagisa forced himself to nod slightly before fleeing.

"W-wait!" He heard Kayano call after him, but he could not bring himself to stop. He felt a wave of despair crash over him and he suddenly collapsed once he deemed himself far enough away from his love. He sat on the ground for what seemed like an eternity. He attempted to move, but all he accomplished was a twitch of his facial muscles. 

A small, irrational surge of anger surged up within him. Was it directed towards himself? Towards... Kayano? No, she had done nothing wrong. But... but Nagisa saved her from the brink of insanity. Pulled her up from the bottom of the ocean, when her manic infatuation with revenge had nearly swallowed her. Didn't he deserve her affection? In fact, didn't Kayano basically owe him her life? She had an unpayable debt towards him and yet she passed him off like he was nothing but dirt on her shoe. The least she could do was return his love. In fact, it was him doing her the favour by loving an untrustworthy, violent creature such as herself? She tried to kill their beloved teacher. Who else could possibly have such feelings towards her but Nagisa? 

Nagisa was doing her a great kindness and she didn't care in the slightest. He was a pillar of selflessness, a paradigm of altruism. Shouldn't all women love him? Filthy, disgusting creatures, shaking their heads at real men but swooning at even the sight of an attractive, vapid Chad. They should all just be wiped off the face of the Earth! God knows society would be better without them.

And that was how Nagisa became an incel.