"chiaki is best waifu," sushi said. "no," replied innocence. "Yes," said sushi. "no" "Yes.""all might is best girl," innocence argued. this little quarell went on for about 5 1/2 months. until one day, innocence saw chiaki do something horrible and illegal. she was drinking while underage! innocence felt she had to do something about this issue. "YOURE NOT LEGALLY OLD ENOUGH TO DRINK!" chiaki replied, "ITS SODA!" chiaki argued that it was okay to drink souda at her age. no! it is not okay. it is against the law. innocence could have just reported chiaki to the authorities, but she thought she could try and resolve this problem with words. "NO! DONT DRINK SOUDA EITHER!" she said. chiaki was furious, and wanted to win this fight. she used all the common sense, logic, and brain cells she had left and yelled, "LIKE, WHY WOULD I DRINK WHEN IT SMELLS LIKE CRAP?" you see, chiaki isnt one for more explicit words. she uses words like crap, frick, darn, etc. "THEN WHY ARE YOU DRINKING IN THE FIRST PLACE?" innocence asked, but before chiaki could add a response, innocence explained, "SOUDA WANTS TO BE DRANK BY SONIA, NOT YOU! BUT SONIA SAID 'NO BITCH' AND WENT FOR HAMSTER DUDE." innocence took a big, deep, breath and continued, "Souda is going through a really tough time right now, so I'd appreciate it if you stop harrassing him and AND NOT BREAK THE DAMN LAW!" after innocence stopped talking, chiaki grew so angry, that she decided that this argument wasnt worth it, and gave up. she then dropped her almost empty can on the ground. "UGH, FINE!" replied chiaki. she stormed off to sushi's house and ran into his closet and slept there for the night. but then souda fought over the zipper with baby gangsta, and souda fell in love. soon after, unfortunately, souda found out baby gangsta had a thing for sword woman. this made souda want to tie the noose already. chiaki and sushi girly giggled while spectating this whole situation go down. souda looked at them and gave them the angry finger. the two gasped and walked away, giving glances at souda angrily. but now, lets pan over to hot man hot man, who beat it to hope. however, shsl ahoge had something to say to hot man hot man- he wanted to share his deepest, most darkest secret. hot man hot man asked, "What is it, shsl ahoge?" this was hard for shsl ahoge, for he had never shared this before with anyone. he took a big breath and said, "I am secretly hope." hot man hot man gasped. "Really?" he asked, just to confirm that this was not a joke. "yes," shsl ahoge replied, "i also have a thing for cum hair." hot man hot man's face lit up. he opened his arms and gave shsl ahoge a big hug. from that day forward, hot man hot man then beat it to shsl ahoge himself. hot man hot man and shsl ahoge had a beautiful life together..but it was too late. kiibo had found out cosplay glasses flare was the mastermind after all, meaning she was a traitor! kiibo was offended, and sick of these ultimate bitches. this caused kiibo to blow up the place, leaving everyone inside and outside dead...except for three special lil snowflakes. these three survivors were the plot armour protag, the magical loli bc they didnt think of any way to kill her, and an edgier sword woman. when the whole place was blown up, kiibo seemed to be malfunctioning pretty badly. "no," he said, before he blew out his own brain using his own ahoge. this then caused him to self destruct. the last three filthy cum dumpsters had a bunch of threesomes, and a bunch of children. they had wonderful lives with their children, but unfortunately died as they got older. the end.
so-
what did we learn today?
dont drink, wear your seatbelt, and leave the ahoges alone.
thank you for your presence.
cast-
innocence: whats that?
sushi: sushi
chiaki: chiaki
soda: souda
souda: soda
sonia: uh nevermind
hamster man: gundham tanaka
baby gangsta: fuyuhiko
sword woman: peko pekoyama
hot man hot man: nagito komaeda
hope: hajime hinata
shsl ahoge: hajime hinata
hajime hinata: hope
kiibo: moby
moby: he wants tim
cosplay glasses flare: tsumigi
ultimate bitches: everyone.
the three special lil snowflakes: plot armour protag, the magical loli, and an edgier peko
plot armour protag: honestly idk probably shuichi or someone. gayden just contributed to this and i-
magical loli: himiko yumeno. are you stupid?
edgier peko: no thanks
youre welcome for giving you more self esteem
