Prince of Traitors

Jasper

The water is icy as I wade into the lake. My muscles tense at the cold, and pain shoots through my bruised jaw as my teeth chatter. The water comes up to my ribs, and I cup it in my hands and wet my hair. I scrub the grime from my head, revelling in the normalcy of the act. Slowly I was away the dirt and chip off the dried blood from my skin, my hair.

Owin enters the water next to me, several yards away. She dives under the surface, splashing me as she kicks her feet. She surfaces and runs her hands through her wet hair. Water falls from it in rivulets and makes her shirt cling to her small waist. I stare at her as she scrubs water over her face.

Despite the cold water, my face goes hot. I avert my gaze when Owin finally opens her silver eyes. She peers sidelong at me and arches an eyebrow. I can almost hear her teasing tone, even without her saying anything.

She yelps when a splash careens into her. Nimia laughs and cowers when her sister sends a wave of water back at her. I laugh as the girls splash water back and forth at each other. Finally Owin ducks under the water and lifts Nimia over her shoulder. They both fall into the water with boisterous laughter, and I step aside to let them play. I forget sometimes that Nimia is still a child, that Owin is still a big sister.

I cup water in my hands again and scrub my face some more. I'll shave with the knife that Rahmi dropped later, once I'm clean. My hair is uncharacteristically long, but I find I don't mind the change.

I hear movement in the water and look up to see Kieran approaching me. His mouth is pressed into a tight line, his eyes hard.

"Hey," he begins.

"What do you want?" I reply, my voice short.

"Can I talk to you?"

I stare at my hands, pretend to rub some invisible dirt from them. "Are you going to tell me to piss off again?" I ask.

"I—No," he says. "I just wanted to—to thank you."

"For what?"

Kieran sighs. "Owin won't tell me what happened to her down in Highcaster, but... you've watched her back for a long time out here," he says. "She means everything to me, so it means everything to me that you looked out for her. So... thank you."

I shake my head, water dripping from my hair. "I was only returning the favor. She's saved my hide more times than I can count," I say. I pause for a moment. "You don't need to thank me."

"Yes, I do. I—" Kieran stammers. Clears his throat. "You never meant for anything to happen to her. I've been an ass to you."

I snort a little. "Is that an apology?"

"I... Yes."

I exhale. Despite myself, I find I appreciate his candor. "Apology accepted, then."

Kieran is quiet for a long time. I don't look at him, but he doesn't move from where he stands in the water near me. He inhales a few times, about to say something, before he finally speaks. "We grew up together," he says. "My parents died when I was young and Owin's family took me in. I don't really remember my own parents, I just remember not being able to eat or sleep or speak.

"But... If I ever found Aroll or Emlyn—or goddesses forbid, Owin or her sisters—like you found your—" He cuts himself off, but I don't need to guess what he'd have said. "And then to be locked up, unable to mourn... I don't know what I'd do."

I glance at him. He's chewing on his lip, looking at everything but me. "Part of me wishes I'd done something about it," I say, my voice quiet. "Tried to find the killer on my own or something, I don't know. Mostly I wish I'd been ready for it, which is silly."

"What do you mean?"

I shrug, look down at my hands again. "When you're a child, you assume your parents are invincible. And you never want to see them as anything less," I say. I speak slowly, trying to articulate my thoughts. "You never want to see things change, but they do. And as much as you try, you can never be ready for how things are going to go.

"I suppose I was hoping I could just be the prince for a while longer, put off the inevitable." I chuckle. "Now look where I am. I never thought my twin would be on the throne and I'd be in a lake in Astria with three Navaarim."

This surprises a laugh from Kieran, and then I'm laughing too. I look up at him and see, for probably the first time since I've known him, a grin on his face.

"Well, I don't think it's silly," he says, his voice quiet. "The wanting to be ready bit."

I snort and smile softly. "Good, because the lake bit is horseshit. It's freezing in here."