The Reichenbach Fall [Reader Insert]

The Itsy Bitsy Spider - Part 1

     "Normal is an illusion. What's normal for the spider is chaos for the fly." -Charles Addams 

"A consulting criminal."

     "Yes. That is what I said, isn't it?" you responded, staring back at the prosecuting barrister, Miss Sorrel, plainly. You found yourself struggling not to stray too far from polite.

      She frowned marginally. "Can you expand on that statement?"

      "I can," you replied. Sherlock caught your eye from the opposite stand and raised a brow. You winked.

     "...Will you?" added the prosecuting barrister, looking rather deadpan.

     "James Moriarty is for hire."

     "A tradesman."

     "Yes."

     "But not the sort who'd fix your heating," she prompted.

      "No," you replied, "more the kind who'd plant a bomb or stage an assassination, but I'm sure he'd make a pretty decent job of your boiler."

     This earned a smirk from the barrister and muffled laughter from a few in the court. The judge cast a stern eye across the room.

     "Would you describe him as--"

     "Leading," Sherlock put in.

      "What?"

     "You're leading the witness," you explained politely. "The defending barrister will object and the judge will uphold."

     "Mr. Holmes and Miss (L/N), we're quite fine without your help," the judge grumbled, looking exasperated. You looked at Sherlock with a meaningful expression. Don't push him, you thought. I'm not pushing, I'm testing, seemed to be Sherlock's response in his smug look.

     "Ask her how. How would she describe him? What opinion has she formed of him? Do they not teach you this?" said Sherlock, leaning forward and resting his weight on his elbows while his hands were clasped in front of him.

     "How would you describe this man's character, Miss (L/N)" the prosecuting barrister relented, before the judge could chide Sherlock again. 

     You opened your mouth to speak but Sherlock interrupted (again), "James Moriarty isn't a man at all. He's a spider; a spider at the center of a web." As Sherlock spoke, you found Moriarty's gaze from across the room. He was already staring at you. He winked. "A criminal web with a thousand threads and he knows precisely how each and every single one of them dances."

     Moriarty nodded so smally anyone who wasn't looking wouldn't have noticed.

     "I second that," you offered in an attempt to calm the judge who looked very annoyed at Sherlock speaking out of turn. 

     The prosecuting barrister cleared her throat awkwardly. "And how long--"

     "No, no,  don't-- don't do that," Sherlock groaned, closing his eyes and shaking his head.  The prosecuting barrister sighed.

     "Mr. Holmes," growled the judge. "Miss (L/N) is being questioned, not you, and certainly neither of you are doing the questioning, thank you."

      "It wasn't the best line of enquiry," you pointed out in Sherlock's defense. "Moriarty and I have met twice, eight minutes in total, in which he pretended to be a technician, held John Watson hostage, and threatened both of our lives. I felt we had a special something," you added dryly.