MCGRANNYPOUNDER THE BABY SEAGULL

Mcgrannypounder the baby seagull liked to eat bread sticks with Parmesan, garlic, and the fermented shit of a 69 year old Galapagos tortoise. One day mcgrannypounder the baby seagull decided to go to Kmart to get some tin foil to decorate a pile of stuff. But then Mcgrannypounder saw an old lady he flew up to her and asked "May I vagazzle you?" The old lady pissed herself and fed Mcgrannypounder a bread stick. Mcgrannypounder got some rhinestones and vagazzled the old lady, she walked away, her vagina blinding everyone. Mcgrannypounder found a muffin tin to shit in, and flew out of Kmart. When Mcgrannypounder got to his nest he realized he had completely forgotten the tin foil "Fuck?!?" Sqwauked Mcgrannypounder. "HOW THE FUCK AM I SUPPOSED TO DECORATE?!?!?" Moaned Mcgrannypounder. Mcgrannypounder was furious so he went to a nursing home to talk with grannys to calm himself. He flew into his favorite old lady's room "Mildred!" he chirped. "I'm here!". "Herrow!" Said Mildred in a raspy voice while taking a shit in her diaper, Mcgrannypounder thought Mildred in a diaper was probably the sexiest thing he had ever seen, but he snapped out of it and said "do you have any tin foil?"..."No but I have spray butter." Replied Mildred. Mcgrannypounder took the spray butter to his pile of stuff and sprayed away, the pile was so glossy and beautiful. At this point Mcgrannypounder was exhausted from spraying all of that butter, so he decided to take a nap in Kmart. When Mcgrannypounder woke up he ate a bread stick. Then a crazy Ukrainian lady walked up to Mcgrannypounder and moaned "HOW DARE YOU BANG MY BABUSHKA YOU PERVERTED BIRD!!!" Then she shot Mcgrannypounder in the ass with a rifle "it was consensual." Mcgrannypounder retorted while trying to dislodge the bullet from his ass. To be continued...