My Silver Lining **Completed**

Chapter 18 - I'm... Pregnant?

I woke up, and for a millisecond I felt content, before the discovery came back to mind. I shot up in my bed, placing my hand on my stomach. Could it be possible? Andrew didn't use any protection, but neither did Dylan. That was honestly the farthest thing from my mind in both moments. Oh no. Oh no no no. This cannot be happening.

If I was, and there is a strong possibility, how would I know who the father is? How are people going to react? How am I going to raise a child? How will I even provide for the baby? Stop.

I forced myself to calm down and think. Before I let these questions get out of hand. I decided to make absolutely sure I was pregnant before I started jumping to conclusions and there was only one way to do that.

I walked as best as I could using my crutches, making my way to the pharmacy in a daze. I didn't know when it had started raining but I was drenched as I stepped into the store. I walked toward the aisle the object I was searching for would be. I scanned the various brands and grabbed two different brands that looked reliable. I stuck them in my basket and headed to the cashier, my mission accomplished.

I ignored the women's disapproving look as she scanned the pregnancy tests, I honestly don't even think it registered in my brain. I was still out of it. I pulled my hood back up walking into the rain and headed back to my house around the corner.

I shoved the brown paper bag into my sweatshirt and trudged along. My mind blank. It was easier to function like that.

I had finally made it back I went to the restroom first and followed all the instructions, then as I sat there awareness hit me again and everything became very clear. I could be pregnant. And I don't know who the father was. My whole future depends on this white plastic stick that I held in my hands. It seemed strange. I cried for a couple of minutes and I wasn't exactly sure why. I figured it was mostly because I was terrified.

The seconds felt like minutes and the minutes felt like hours. I sat there with my head in my hands until the timer on my phone let out a screech. I shut it off taking a deep breath before I reached for the plastic stick and closed my eyes. Bringing it into where I believed I would see it, I counted to three and then opened my eyes.

And there it was, the little plus sign. Part of me already knew from the beginning, I just didn't want to admit it to myself. I sobbed placing it back on the counter. It all began crashing down on me.

Just like that, I felt utterly and completely hopeless. I never in a million years thought I would be pregnant at my age. Let alone not identify who the father is. How was I going to tell my parents? How was I going to tell Dylan?

Abortion was out of the question, I wouldn't be able to do that. Adoption? I don't know how I feel about giving my baby to another family and there was always the possibility of foster care and I wouldn't do that.

I gave up on the trying to sort it all out now. I got up cleaned myself up and went to go lay down. I fell asleep sobbing into my pillow.

I was in and out of consciousness all day. I'd wake up completely oblivious for a few seconds before it all would come crashing down on me. Occasionally I'd fall back asleep and sometimes I'd get up, stand in front of my full length mirror, pick up my shirt and stare at my stomach. I'd touch it, completely dumbfounded that there was something inside of me, but then I'd remember that the poor child might not have a father. I would never want anyone to grow up like that.

Sometimes I'd ask myself what I would do if the father was Dylan instead of Andrew and vice versa. Obviously I would rather it be Dylan, although I know it would affect his academic future and scholarships. I don't want to ruin his life.