my own lights

chapter one: basketball at night

i lock the door behind me, listening for the soft automatic click. thanks to my parents sudden large income of money due to their quickly gaining fame, some short film they recently published, we afforded renovating our old home. in addition to automatic locks, we now had cameras installed outside every window, a new dishwasher that could wash better than a mother of many, and a new puppy.

the puppy part i liked. it didn't matter anyway, they weren't willing to sponsor any of my athletic wants. they refused to pay for my gears and uniforms. they refused to pay emotionally too, they never showed up to my games- always claiming to be at another film fair or something along the lines of other lame excuses.

but i didn't have time to dwell on their uninterest in their only child. night has just fallen and it's my favorite time to play basketball. i slide down the stair banister of our brooklyn apartment and into the main lobby.

it's mainly dark but i still stop by one of the mirrors. my thick kinky blue hair is in a giant poof on top of my head, which is the first thing people usually notice about me, and my large dark brown eyes stare back at me, almost incredulously. i glare at myself before forcing a smile onto my face, my large lips stretching across my mouth, revealing a neat row of white teeth, a nice contrast to my brown skin. my nose itself stretches along with it and i crinkle it. i always stop by this mirror because it seems to be the only one that fully contains my full 5'11 height- courtesy of my father. i have my gray soccer shorts on even though i plan on playing basketball, and the basketball is under my arm. it doesn't go well with my pink puma shirt but i don't think i'll run into anyone that cares about my looks while i'm playing.

suddenly mad at myself for wasting precious night time, i jog out the lobby, stifling the urge to bounce my basketball against the rarely quiet lobby. i nod curtly at the watchman and bounce down the steps, finally releasing the basketball.

the cool air feels good blowing through my somewhat thin t-shirt and the steadying rhythmic sound of the basketball bouncing against the cement already cools my unease. i slip into a different apartments basketball court, happy to see its empty and start shooting from the free throw line. my first one misses- i'm probably rusty from spending almost all of summer on swimming, but i still shoot. my next few are still off but i keep going until i get five in a row. i keep doing that until i get seven in a row. after a while i take a break, bringing my basketball with me to an empty picnic table.

i glance at my watch {1:27 A.M.} it reads. i wonder what my parents are doing right now, no doubt still celebrating their success by drinking too much champagne and re watching their short film. they probably haven't even noticed that i've left. i try to let it not bother me and decide to look around at my surroundings instead. it's dark and completely quiet, its a school night -wednesday- so of course, but i'm not worried about it. i'm online schooled- my decision. my parents can't care less, it seems like they gave up on trying to get me into the arts, even a little bit. especially after my freak out at the pottery wheel ( i wiped clean a shelf of newly brought out from the kiln bowls onto the floor because mine didn't turn out nearly as wells as anyone else's ) they've left me alone.

i look across at the apartment building and notice only very few of the windows have their lights on. amongst the few that do, is one on the second floor. i could see the frame of a girl curled into the window, against the wall with a pen, and i'm assuming a notebook of some kind, in her lap. i can't see her individual features all that too well but she seems to be looking at me. i raise my hand up as in a kind of greeting but she doesn't move from her spot. oh well, it was just an instinct, i don't know why i really did it. i get up to make my way back home when i notice the girl in the window, she's waving her hand frantically as if to say "stay right there". i don't know why but i interpret it as that and stay put. soon the light in the room goes out and i wait a few minutes.