It hurts to see what's happening. It is my doing I did this. But it's not like I had much of a choice. I'm nothing to you but a friend a good one who cares for you and wants you to be happy more than themselves. I will never have a chance. No matter how hard I try I'm just not right. I really love you more than you will ever know. I would give you the world. Even if that meant risking it all. Your going to be happy with him and I'm going to put up a front showing how happy I am. But deep down I just wish it was me. I'll cry every time I hear about you guys and have to laugh and say that beautiful that's great. The though of ending it seems so great. Won't have to feel the pain of doing. What if I told you what you meant and what I would give. Would it just be a cute jester from a friend. It would be like a little kid asking out your older sister friend will never work. I'm just a friend with lots of feeling. Just one time could I get a chance.? Can I get a break? Or will I have to break to see what was there? Will it be worth it. Is my stupidity my down fall, or was it my hope that broke me? Will I be able to get back to the way I was? Many questions never to be answered. How does this make you feel? Horrible,Sad,Happy,Mad,Ashamed. These thoughts ruin rampant in my head.
... or
Was this all a lie.
