¤ F R E D D Y ¤
5:56 AM, Monday, September 2
Another day, another (school) year, another new beginning.
I sighed to myself, as I got up from my bed and went to the sink to wash my face up.
I'm not really in the mood for anything. I feel emotionless.
Like what I always do everyday, after I wash my face I cook up the breakfast for my brothers before they wake up.
I cleaned up their trash from last night, like what a robot would do.
I can't feel anything. I don't know anything.
As I heard the toaster make a small dinging sound, I walked up to it and got my toast for breakfast.
I also made coffee for me in hopes that it'll help me wake up in my gloomy state.
After what happened last week, I didn't really know what to think about anymore.
My world once revolved around her, and now that she's out of my clutches, I don't know what to do anymore.
I don't know what could complete me without her anymore.
Is this what He planned for me? Am I really destined to suffer the perlious reality called life?
I didn't really know.
I thought she can help me find that reason, but now I have no clue now that she's gone.
She's gone.
Those words ringed in my head as I sipped coffee on my mug and got a small bite out of my toast.
She's gone, and you're much of a wimp to get over it.
I sighed, placing my mug on the table and ran a hand on my head in frustration.
She has him now, at least be happy that she found someone else.
I told that to myself, but the weight of that statement never crashed over me, as if it's nothing.
Have I really been that blind?
"Have I?" I asked myself, letting my voice echo through the small vaccant room I'm in right now. I let that thought linger on my head for a moment.
Everyone has told me to run, to go somewhere out of her reach, to avoid her enchanting beauty that can lure you into a deep abyss with no escape.
But I didn't listen, because I thought before that they were wrong.
Only to end up with you being wrong all along.
I felt a small tear run down my cheek, as I bite down on my toast.
"Was she really worth crying over?" I asked again, sounding like a small sob rather than a question.
I mean, I've known her for my entire life, I can't just hate her just like that. It was her choice.
Her choice, your loss.
As Scott said to me once, "You can't hate a person you once loved."
She was my light in times of my darkest days, she guided me out of that cave I was trapped in for years, she was the one who helped me through my highs and lows, and yet she chose to leave.
But why?
Maybe you don't know her the way you did before.
I sighed, clearing out my thoughts as I finished my breakfast and took a shower, with the same thoughts swirling through my head over, and over, and over again.
