i will burn for the things i love

2. savior

As soon as their lips touched, Natsu detonated.

Fire coursed along every inch of his skin, burning so bright that it pierced through Gray's closed eyelids. It filled the space between them; a tension building above their heads that stretched and crackled until it burst out in a spiral of flame. The blaze exploded through the ruins of the city – brilliant tornadoes of orange light that licked at the remains of charred buildings and glinted off shattered glass.

Gray braced himself for the pain, but none came – instead he felt nothing but a tingling warmth that surrounded them both.

As quickly as the flames had appeared, they dissolved, leaving nothing but tiny cinders that drifted around them like fiery snowflakes. Natsu kissed Gray like it was the only thing keeping him alive, like if they stopped breathing against each other, Natsu would stop existing and dissolve into sparks.

"I'm here," Gray murmured, tightening his fingers in Natsu's hair and moving his other hand to wrap around Natsu's waist. "I've got you."

Natsu's breath stuttered and he pulled back from Gray, staring down at his hands. The dark flames had receded, leaving nothing but reddish marks like healed burns.

Natsu looked up at Gray with unfocused eyes, then slumped forward, head hitting Gray's shoulder as they both sunk to their knees.

Gray gasped as the pain returned full force, blistering across his skin until he was dizzy and choking on smoke and ash. He clutched Natsu tightly, fingers digging into Natsu's shoulders as he let out a pained cry from between gritted teeth.

Natsu was heavy against him, and panic joined the pain as Gray brought trembling fingers to Natsu's neck. A pulse fluttered there, weak and erratic.

Gray closed his eyes, exhaling sharply as the devil slayer marks on his skin surfaced, spreading and winding until they covered half his body. Everywhere they touched felt cool – a gentle relief from the searing pain.

"We're okay," he whispered, tugging at the magic, trying to spread it further across his blistered skin. His arms shook with the effort of holding up Natsu, but Gray refused to let go. "It's gonna be okay," he said again, pressing a kiss to Natsu's hair.

When Gray finally collapsed, there was nothing left of the city but ash.

-----

Gray woke up in and unfamiliar room with Natsu curled around him. He blinked a few times, trying to clear his blurry vision as he looked around. Two beds, a washbasin, a window spilling in bright sunlight, luggage stacked along the wall. Gray felt unreal; a hazy film filling his head where memories should be.

Gray looked back down at the messy head of pink hair that rested on his chest.

"Hey," Gray said, nudging Natsu and wincing as his voice scraped along the inside of his throat. Natsu's eyes flew open and the confused, sleepy expression on his face was quickly replaced with one of relief.

"Gray," Natsu breathed, sitting up and reaching out to touch Gray's cheek. Natsu's face was a blotchy mess, tangled hair falling into red-rimmed eyes. "You're okay."

Gray tipped his head into Natsu's palm, sighing at the gentle touch. Natsu brushed his fingers through Gray's hair, then leaned in and kissed his forehead.

"What happened?" Gray asked, pushing himself up on one elbow. A searing pain rushed up the left side of Gray's body and he hissed in pain, clenching his teeth.

"Careful," Natsu said gently, putting his hand on Gray's back and helping him sit up. As Natsu stacked several pillows behind him, Gray's gaze dropped to the bandages that covered the left half of his body. A singed patch of skin peeked out from the edge of one of the wrappings – red and pink blisters against Gray's dark skin.

Smoke and flames filled Gray's mind and he squeezed his eyes shut, bringing his hand up to his head. "What..." Gray's throat burned, and he started to cough, doubling over and crying out in pain as the motion pulled at his bandages.

A cup of water appeared in his hand and Gray took it, gulping it down gratefully. Then he sighed and tipped his head back against the headboard. Natsu's hand withdrew from where it had been combing through Gray's hair.

"I'm sorry," Natsu whispered, looking down at his hands. Gray followed his gaze – Natsu's skin was unblemished, no sign of the destruction that had exploded from him.

"You... the fire." Gray said slowly. "You ate those weird flames, and..."

"And I hurt you," Natsu said, voice thick with shame. "That... it's my fault." He gestured to the bandages on Gray's arm, then rubbed at his face. "Fuck, I'm so sorry."

"Are you okay?" Gray asked, reaching out and taking Natsu's hand. Natsu tried to pull away from him, but Gray didn't let go.

"You're the one that's hurt," Natsu whispered.

"I'm fine," Gray insisted.

"You're not fine!" Natsu's cheeks were pink, eyes wet with tears, and he tried to pull away from Gray again.

Gray shook his head and grabbed both Natsu's wrists, ignoring the pain and pulling Natsu close again. "Don't push me away," Gray murmured, pressing their foreheads together. "Yeah, it hurts like hell, but I'm okay because you're okay."

"I hate seeing you hurt," Natsu whispered. "I don't... I can't remember." He looked up again, pulling one wrist out of Gray's grasp and running his fingers lightly up Gray's bandaged arm. "I did this."

"I let you," Gray said. Natsu's brow furrowed in confusion, and Gray sighed. "You think I couldn't have kicked your ass if I wanted to?" He squeezed Natsu's hand and the black marks began to crawl up his arm, soothing the ache of the burns as they twisted around his bicep and up to his cheek.

"Then... why didn't you?" Natsu asked, voice breaking. "You could have..."

"What would that have done?" Gray asked, tugging on Natsu's hand until Natsu curled back up against his uninjured side, head resting under Gray's chin. "I knew I could bring you back."

A silence descended over them and Gray breathed deeply, pressing his face into Natsu's hair. He still smelled like ash, like smoke and flame, but underneath it was something warm and familiar that felt like home.

"I'm dangerous," Natsu said eventually. His voice was soft and small as he traced the black marks on Gray's chest with his fingertips.

"We both are," Gray said softly, placing one of his hands over Natsu's heart. "I know that scares you, but you're not alone."

Natsu covered Gray's hand with his own, swallowing hard as he moved his gaze over to the door. "They're scared of me, now," he said, and it was both a statement and a question.

"Maybe," Gray admitted, holding Natsu tightly against him. "But I'm not." He kissed Natsu's head. "And I never will be."