vớ vẩn 2

chap 19 - Bottle

Taehyung didn't want to get off the floor even though he had been lying there for hours now, hadn't moved to do anything beyond breathing or blinking. He felt safe on the floor, lying on his stomach with his face turned ever so slightly to the side so that he could breathe without choking on the filth trapped in the carpet pile. He couldn't see his friends looking at him even when he could feel their gazes on his back. Once or twice Seokjin had hunkered down at his side in the hopes of getting him to look at him, leaning forward enough so that his own head grazed against the floor, and Taehyung just closed his eyes and refused to open them again until he heard him move away. Namjoon didn't attempt to make eye contact and the few words he had said to him had sounded weary, as if he was about to give up at any moment and just sleep instead. Jungkook had tried to get answers out of him by sitting beside him and prodding him, harassing him in the hopes that his stabbing finger would annoy him enough to get a reaction, but it didn't work. He was too numb to the world to even feel the sensation of him poking him in the ribs, too very distant to it all. Hoseok didn't even say a word, never mind try and look at him, and that just made him feel even worse. What was going through the other boy's mind right now? Had been coursing through it since Jimin had blurted all of that shit out and then ran off to cry like a baby?

He wanted to be mad at the boy but he found that he couldn't, because he should have expected such an outcome the minute Jimin found out what had happened to him that night. He should have threatened him some more and scared him off, should have maybe hit him a few times just to get him to leave the bathroom, but he had stupidly told him everything and back in the bathroom he had thought that it would come back to haunt him but he had been hoping that it wouldn't; that perhaps the boy would manage to keep his secret like he had sworn. But of course that didn't happen. What had happened was Jimin had caved in from the pressure of carrying so much stupid shit around and he had blurted it out. Hoseok's pills, Yoongi's burns, they were all nothing in comparison to the secret that the boy had been carrying for him and he should have just kept his mouth shut but he had been stupid and had insulted him. And now Taehyung was currently paying the price for fucking up and pinning the blame on someone else just like he always did; Jimin was such an easy fall guy. If he had just left the Yoongi situation alone and not made those comments then this wouldn't have happened, but he had felt the need to open his big mouth and shoot himself right in the face.

They all knew about what had happened that night. They all knew that he had let some random stranger fuck him for such a pitiful amount of cash and there was nothing he could to try and deny it or hide it any more. It should have been easier now that it was out in the open but right now he just wanted to lie there and not move. He wished that he didn't have to breathe too but sadly that option was unavoidable.

Where was Jimin right now? If the boy did something stupid then he was to blame and for once he wasn't going to try and bullshit his way out of it, he was more than willing to take the full responsibility. What a wonderful time to start acting like an adult, at the cost of his friend hurting himself or worst. Taehyung closed his eyes and he felt a little moan escaping his lips, nauseous sensation in the pit of his stomach. At the noise he heard someone shifting across the room and he waited for a question but no one said anything to him.

Taehyung could smell tobacco on the carpet and he saw a cast-off butt not too far from his position, one that had likely been in Yoongi's hands just that morning when he had walked into the room to talk to them. It was crumpled from being stubbed out on something but it wasn't his skin for once at least. Why did he have to mention those stupid burns? When the man got back he was pretty sure that he was going to kick his teeth in for causing all of this shit and once again, he knew that he totally deserved it. Hell, if his friend didn't kick the shit out of him then he would probably beg him to do so, on hands and knees if needed because he felt like he needed to hurt just that little more to make it even. Yoongi had had nothing to do with Hoseok's pills and he had known it the minute that his friend had asked Jimin about it. He had seen that very same expression on his face like when he had asked him about the marks on the Yoongi's arm, the one that showed that Jimin was telling the truth. But none of the others had picked up on it of course, they had all thought that the boy was sticking up for him but not Taehyung; Taehyung had known and he had purposely baited Jimin in the hopes that he would just quietly admit to it so they could just move on from the incident. But by baiting him out he had caused even more trouble. Wasn't that what he was best at? Causing so much trouble that it was almost unbelievable, and right now because of him their friendship circle was in great danger of breaking apart.