All I Want | Yoonmin

Chapter 21

Yoongi POV

Taking a deep breath, I just sit here as I let Tae wrap me up in a couple blankets before he runs off to the kitchen to grab the mug of hot chocolate he'd made for me. I take it from him gratefully, terrified for when Jimin is going to get here considering he should be here any time now.

It's Saturday already, though I'm not entirely sure that I'm anymore ready for the conversation now than I had been the day he showed up.

Just before Tae can sit down with me, there's a knock at the door and I flinch lightly at the sound of it. I keep my gaze cast to the mug in my hands as Tae goes over to the door to let the other inside, still not entirely ready to see the younger yet. Though, before I'd even really like, Tae is taking his seat side of me, allowing me to curl into him for comfort, while Jimin sits down on the other end of the couch.

"Alright, we're not going to sit here in silence for the entire day. Jimin, as much as you probably hate this, I think it's only fair that you go first. You're the one who created this whole ordeal, and you need to explain what happened and why you did what you did." Tae says with a sigh. I swallow thickly, still not looking at the younger on the other side. I hear him take a deep breath though, and I close my eyes in attempt to prepare myself.

"Okay. I guess you're right, it's only fair." Jimin mumbles quietly, running a hand through his hair.

"I... I've known for a while that I was interested in guys, okay? My parents are really strict though, and so I always hid it from them. You guys had been the first people that I actually came out to, but Yoongi wasn't there that day that I admitted it. I never really had the heart to do it again, especially to the guy that I fell for the first day I saw him. That... That day you came over and I pushed you away, Yoongi... I had been talking to my parents earlier that morning. I fucked up though because of how tired I'd been, and I slipped up while talking to them. My father put my words together and figured out that I'm gay, and... And they disowned me completely. I panicked after their reaction. I didn't want to risk continuing to be around you and slipping up again in front of you, and risk losing you forever because you'd be disgusted with me. I was terrified you'd be disgusted if you knew, and if I was going to lose you, I didn't want it to be with you hating me for it. I-I know it was dumb, but that's why I pushed you away. I pushed you away even though you're everything that I ever wanted." Jimin breathes out, voice a bit shaky as he speaks.

My eyes widen a bit at this, lifting my head up to look at him for the first time since he's gotten here.

"I'm sorry, Yoongi. I never meant to hurt you this badly. I was scared and hurt and I didn't know what else to do at the time." Jimin whimpers softly, tears slowly beginning to roll down his cheeks.

I bite my lip at this, curling into Tae a bit more. I don't know at all how to feel, so many conflicting emotions mixing around inside of me.

"Yoongi, you can understand that, can't you?" Tae murmurs softly in my ear, making me look up at him. I take a deep breath at this, knowing exactly what he's getting at.

The fact that it took me over a year just to accept myself and admit it to myself that I'm interested in guys just as I am in girls, and to admit to myself that I'd actually fallen for Jimin.

"Yeah. Yeah, I understand." I whisper shakily, remembering so many nights in the last year or so that Tae had to spend with me, helping me through it all and helping me with myself.

"Think you can forgive him, hyung? You understand where he'd been coming from with his decision after all." Tae asks gently with a small smile.

Biting my lip lightly, I glance back over to Jimin who's just sat quietly watching us. I let my gaze fall from him for a moment, trying to work through the fear and the pain that's still grasping for my throat.

Sighing in attempt to calm myself, I look back over to him once more, nervously nodding my answer.

"Yeah. Yeah, I forgive you."