Foolosophy

Chapter 01

Arya sucked in a deep breath, desperate to calm her raging nerves. It wasn't so much the feeling of betrayal, but more so of utter shock and simple loss of respect. She shut her eyes tight, events of the very afternoon replaying shamelessly in her mind.

~

"There's something I need to tell you," he whispered, towering over her frame. 

"Go on..." Arya trailed, her insides racing with every second that he postponed the dreadful news. A part of her knew it would never happen again, they would never happen again. However, she desperately clutched on to the string of hope that left her dangling solemnly from the edge. 

"I asked Dani out last night."

She could feel herself crumble into a million pieces. Almost suddenly, her body felt like an unnecessary burden that her feet forcefully bore. 

"She said yes, didn't she?" Arya croaked, surprising herself with how confidently her words came out. She seemed to be feeling the exact opposite.

"Yeah." He spoke quietly, searching her face for a reaction. 

Arya knew he expected her to break, or perhaps even choose the drastic option and grace his soft skin one last time with a slap. She knew better, though. There was no way in hell that she was going to let him have the satisfaction of watching her fall. 

"Wow. That was soon. It hasn't even been a month since we ended it."

"I know, but I assure you, this has nothing to do with us. You know I meant everything I said to you, when I said it. I wanted you to hear this from me, and not from someone else. I owe you that much. I figured that we have three months of school left, and then who knows where I'll be and where she'll be. I kind of just went for it, you know..." He ranted, but she was aware that he was simply finding justification for his actions.

"Good for you, Jace. Really." She interjected, her voice softer than she expected. 

He looked taken aback by her reply. Arya carefully followed the movements of his hands, watching as he cautiously placed them on his sides. She knew he was a step away from giving her a final hug; a culmination of their rollercoaster. 

Instead, Arya forced a smile and turned around, descending down the staircase. She walked away from her first love, with bitter realization clouding her senses – she had lost him.

~

Arya opened her eyes, suddenly feeling awful. She took a brief moment to stare at the walls of her room, gazing at the scattered memories stuck with tape. It was time she took the photographs down. The thought of Jace with another girl, let alone someone who she had known for years, made her uncomfortable. 

Jace and Arya had been each others' first love, first relationship and first kiss. She didn't like to ponder much about what lay awaiting them in the near future, but she hadn't seen their terrible break-up coming. It hurt her to even think about her life without him, without the person she had become so accustomed to – without her person. 

She switched her laptop on with ease, hovering her fingers over the keypad as her eyes casually skimmed through her newsfeed. Arya's gazed diverted to her list of friends, finally resting on the green dot beside Jace's name. 

"Fuck you. Fuck you and your promises." She muttered, her distaste for him rolling off her tongue. 

Arya quickly closed her facebook tab. He was everywhere. She could feel tears clouding her vision, but profusely blinked to contain her outflow of emotions. He didn't deserve her tears and he sure didn't deserve knowing how miserable she felt while he gallantly dated someone else. 

As if moving on their own accord, Arya's fingers opened a new tab and typed in a website that she had not visited in a long time. It had been a site that she rarely went to in the past- only on occasions of utter boredom. Arya was aware that it was a dangerous place, but she felt it was time she did something different. After all, she needed to break free from her daily routine of talking to Jace.

'Omegle. Talk to strangers!'

Arya scoffed. 'How cheesy', she thought.

The cursor clicked on the video button, and she gasped as she realized what she had done. She stared at the girl on her computer screen, mimicking her own gestures as the servers began connecting her to a stranger. With a quick movement, Arya placed one hand on her webcam, covering it. She was here to distract herself, but she didn't want to expose herself to a stranger halfway across the globe. 

Arya smiled as she saw her first stranger, but disconnected almost as soon as she began typing. Perhaps it was the excitement of seeing someone she didn't know, or the horror that the stray face would disapprove of her. With one hand still covering her camera, Arya continued her disconnecting spree for a while, staring at the array of faces she didn't recognize. It was almost as if she had travelled the expanse of the planet, meeting foreigners of all races and genders. 

Finally, she grew tired of the website.

It seemed nothing but a bore, and Arya was too scared to reveal herself to the unknown on her screen. 

'Last one,' she thought as she disconnected and watched the Omegle servers find her a new partner. She stared peculiarly at the buffering screen, praying that he or she wouldn't turn out to be a pedophile or a vile, horny teenager. 

Arya's face was suddenly met with another- a dazzling one. He wasn't looking at the camera, perhaps unaware that he had been connected. She noticed him run his long fingers through his hazel hair, brushing it to one side. Arya had never witnessed someone so breathtakingly majestic, and so far away. 

Her attention fell from his face to his bare chest. He was clearly still in bed, as she had previously guessed from his ruffled look. Although she couldn't see much, Arya knew his chest was carefully toned and muscled. 

She noticed his fingers move towards his laptop, and instantly knew he had taken note of her presence. 

Stranger: Hello?

You: Umm, hi.

Stranger: Oh hey there, faceless. 

You: Shit, sorry. I didn't realize my webcam was off. 

Stranger: Are you going to turn it on for me?

You: Depends. 

Stranger: On? 

Stranger: Wait, if you want to see my manhood, then I'm sorry but I don't want to see.

You: What?

You: Oh. OH. I just got it. No, I'm sorry. Not interested in that.

Arya blushed profusely. For a second, she was glad he couldn't see the redness that had risen up to her cheeks. 

Stranger: Switch on your camera, then? I want to see you.

She waited for a second, having an internal struggle within her. This was the first and last time she was going to see him anyway, she might as well remove her hand and reveal herself to the stranger. But at the same time, she was afraid. What if he didn't like what he saw? What if he disconnected, solely because she wasn't the face that matched his expectation? 

Arya hesitated, but slid her hand down reluctantly. 

She was done with expectations. If he disconnected, then to hell with him. She wouldn't let it affect her.

You: So, umm, that's me.

Arya gave the stranger a sheepish smile, and a wave to compliment it. Inside, her heart seemed to be racing, carefully watching his expression. The stranger's gaze moved from the chat box to where she assumed her display had been on his screen. His reaction threw her off-guard.

He widened his blue eyes, raising his eyebrows along the process as his smile grew bigger, revealing his pearly white teeth and a dimple on his left cheek. Arya watched him stare at her for a few seconds, drinking in her appearance with his eyes before typing out a message.

Stranger: You're god damn beautiful.