Gays falling in love (Sanders side's one shot book)

Virgil Sanders (no ship really, maybe Patton x Virgil?)

  
Warnings: Suicide, Panic Attacks, overdoing, Sad Patton.

   Virgil was having a panic attack, but this time it was different. He was a train wreck, no more than a train wreck. He felt more like four planes crashing into each other because the pilots jump off the plane. He just wanted to keep his secret to himself, but he always knew deep down he would have to tell Thomas eventually. Either that or Someone else letting it slip.
   Originally he had wanted to keep the dark sides tame by constantly being on guard, but that didn't work because Deceit got in. Then he just continued to let Deceit slip through and hurt Thomas. Right now Thomas feels like the scum on the earth because of him, again. It's almost like every time he wants to help he just makes things worse for everyone.
   Who could blame him, technically if you really think of it he wasn't really a side, he was a illness. He was something that was hurting Thomas, because he is a illness. Of all things he should just leave and let Thomas be happy with Roman, Logan, Patton, and Deceit, because he seems to keep accepting him back every time. Virgil was useless compared to the others (except Remus really he has almost no use). All he did was make Thomas more paranoid and worse in his already downhill spiral of a life.
   Just the thought of leaving again freaked him out. First of all Patton would be devastated, and Second of all... Virgil couldn't think of a second of all. No one really cared enough about his stability and mental health except...Patton.
   Virgil got up from his bed and decided that since no one other than Patton would care he would...leave. Sure it would hurt for a little bit but they would move on to better things. Thomas will be less paranoid and scared of the smallest of things. Roman would be less held back with his work. Logan wouldn't feel the need to point out Anxiety is causing some sort of issue, and Patton wouldn't need to worry about him as much.
   He didn't know what to do in this situation, either off himself of just run or duck out again. All he knows it that he has to choose the right option or it could be terrible for everyone.
   He decided that Ducking out wasn't an option anymore, because he knows they will come to his room to find him. He also couldn't just leave, he was in Thomas' mind. He hated the thought of offing himself, it was just a terrible way to go, but he was doing this for Thomas and Patton.
   So he went to the bathroom. Grabbed the anxiety medication he stole from Thomas, and with shaky hands popped the lid open and took the whole bottle.
   Virgil felt calmer immediately, as his heart rate started dropping and his breathing slowed down. That's when The crash was heard, and Thomas felt it the feeling he got when Virgil ducked out. Thomas sat up and felt tears prick his eyes "Virgil please don't tell me you're leaving again. Please..." he called the other to only get no response. "Virgil, please"
   The other sides had not responded to Thomas's call for one reason, they were trying to break into Virgil's room. Patton was screaming and crying while Roman held him. Logan was trying so hard to get in the room, trying everything. It took them a total of 3 minutes to get into the room to find Virgil on the floor with a note in his hand. Logan simply brushed the note aside starting to help Virgil first by laying him on his side, then gave him cpr plus First aid.
   Everyone was crying, this wasn't like Virgil, why would he do this. Thomas just waited holding his legs to his chest hoping, praying that Virgil would be safe.
   Patton read the note he left. It simply said "Remus was right, I can never stop being the bad guy." Patton didn't know why those words hurt more than anything, but all they did was echo in his mind, over and over. Roman grabbed Patton hugging him close as he cried, making sure he wasn't looking at the lifeless body that was now Virgil.
   Logan stopped cpr and just turned to Roman, tears welling up in his eyes as he just shook his head. Roman took a breath in, But Patton wasn't having it, "no he's still alive. Help him! Logan help Virgil please!" Roman made sure to tighten his grip around Patton, "Roman let go I need to help Virgil. Roman." Patton pushes and shoved, hit and even bit Roman to try and get out of his grasp but Roman never let him go. "He's still alive! He needs help. Let me help him."
   "Patton stop," It was Logan, "Virgil is gone and we have nothing to do now, so there is no way we could help him in this situation right now." He put it out blandly as he struggled to hide the few tears that slipped from his eyes. "We tried everything we can."
   "No we didn't! We need to help him! Let me go Roman!" He hit Roman over and over each time just getting weaker as he cried, "please, I can't lose him again!" Roman just held him.
   "Trust me Patton, I have done everything I could have done. Virgil is gone." Logan looked at Patton who was still trying to escape Roman. "I wanted him to live too, we all did."
   Roman didn't really know how to respond. You would think that the creative side would know a good response to something like this, but he just had nothing. He was blank, terrified.
   It wasn't until Logan had to tap Roman to let him know that he needed to talk to Patton alone when he reacted. He let Patton go, walking out of the room and let out a soul shaking sob.
   He cried and tore at his hair, just falling to the ground and punching the ground, screaming. How could they let this happen? Virgil knew that Thomas without him was incomplete. So why ever would he do...this? Roman curled up and just held his knees. He knew that Patton was going though unimaginable pain, because Virgil and him were incredibly close. That's when he sat and wiped his tears away, because now that Virgil has done this, he hurt Patton, and in Romans book that's the worst thing to do. Virgil truly was the Villain, and no one cries when the Villain is gone.