What your eyes can't see, your heart understands (Troyler one shot)

Author's note:

HIYAAALLL I'm back after like... probably a millennium to say the least... But here I am anyways with a one shot that was supposed to be short and all that but turned out sliiiightly longer.

Fun fact, while I was finishing this today a wild Jesus appeared on my TV... It was quite contrast.

Anywayyy hope you like this! Oh and !SMUT WARNING! duuuh, we're in the Troyler fandom ;) I don't really understand why people even have to state this at this point :'D Also smushy warning if some of you don't like all that cute stuff.

Love you all to the moon and like 4 times around it and back!

xx smolderingtroyler

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How is it to be blind? How does your imagination work without images? I was often questioned by curious children. Mother's trying to quiet them down saying it's inappropriate to ask such questions, but I wasn't really bothered by it anymore, I had gotten used to it. It was part of me, part of my story. It was like a scar on your skin, it remained there, reminding you of how something once happened in your life. I was born with a disease that took my sight away during the first month of my life. "Darkness" was all I really knew. Or "darkness" as other people described it. For me it wasn't darkness, it was all I knew. It was how I viewed life. How I had learned to view life. Maybe I couldn't see but I felt. Every edge, every corner. Maybe I couldn't see the light, but my world wasn't dark. Maybe I couldn't see the smiles but I heard the laughter. Till this day I had never understood why people expected me to miss something I never had. There's nothing that made me feel sick more than when people felt sorry for me, like I was a dog without a leg or something. I didn't need pity. I didn't feel different from others, so why did they have to think I was?

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I was starting to cross a road after hearing the familiar clicking noise alerting me that the pedestrian lighting had turned green. Just as I lifted my foot off the ground to proceed I heard a loud honking noise and felt someone grabbing me by my waist, dragging me harshly backwards. My heartbeat fastened and I felt my breathing getting quicker and shallower as I tried to fill my emptied lungs. It felt like my bones were pushing straight through my organs, the force was overpowering.

"What the fuck?! Are you trying to kill yourself?! Are you blind?!" I heard someone, most likely a man, yelling next to my ear. In less than a second I had raised my hand to cover my ear to shut out the loudness. My hearing had sharpened over the years quite remarkably and I could easily tell the exact spot of the person speaking to me. And that was right behind me, logically thinking the same person who's hands were still gripping me by my sides.

I stood still for a who knows how long before starting to giggle uncontrollably, I didn't know what had happened, but the adrenaline that had come rushing after the fright started to fade, leaving me gasping for air, for entirely different reasons than just moments ago.

"What's so funny? Why are you laughing?!" The same manly voice asked now almost as in anger.

I, however, started to pay attention to the voice more, it was somewhat pleasing even as I heard the annoyance through it.

"N-n-nothing", I tried to stutter out in-between my erratic laugh.

"I don't find it amusing that you almost killed yourself in front of my eyes", he said letting his grip loosen around my waist.

"I didn't try to kill myself. I was simply starting to cross the road, as I am allowed to, when the light is green", I answered sassiness seeping into my voice. I wasn't trying to be mean, whoever I was talking to most likely saved my ass but the shaming was getting on my nerves. I wasn't the one to be blamed here.