Some Gay Shit

1

"I think we all feel sad at times. It's just a natural emotion. We all feel that sadness to the point we feel like we just can't go on. Maybe there's just no reason to go on. You'll never truly hold something as just yours. Nothing in life belongs to just you. Not your objects, not your thoughts, not even your body is just yours. All I want, is something that's just mine. I want your love to be just mine." Danny's hazel eyes stared deep into my brown ones, "I just want to feel happy, and you make me happy, Farris."

You might find my current situation to be adorable, sweet, even romantic, but it wasn't. Danny really wanted me all to himself, and he made sure he would do whatever it took to get that. When I finally realized that, it was too late, everyone else was gone, even my family was gone. In fact, I was even gone. To the rest of the world, I was dead. Danny made sure it looked that way, Danny made sure I would stay in his little cabin no matter what.

I was such a fool.

"But you can't." I whispered daringly, "not after all this."

He smirked, putting his warm hand to my cheek causing me to flinch, "Farris, Farris, Farris, you might think that now, but I know you love me. You always have. This is just a set back. And if you really don't love me right now, you'll learn to love me once more. I'm all you have, my dear."

"I would rather be dead." I mumbled, afraid to even move.

"Like Raynah? Do you really think your sweet little sister would want you to die now? After all she suffered?" He asked me, wiping away tears that I hardly even felt fall.

"You're a monster, Danny. I shouldn't have let you into my life." I let out a single sob as more tears fell from my brown eyes.

I said I would rather be dead, but I already felt dead. I felt like there was nothing else to live for. It's like he said, all I have left is the man who killed everyone I held close.

"Come on, you don't mean that. You're just confused," his smile was nothing but patient as he pushed my brown hair out of my face, kissing my forehead, "I made sure no one would keep us apart, I kept you from all temptations. Do you even understand how much I've actually done these past few months? I kept you safe from Alec, I gave you everything you could ever want, and I loved you like no one ever could."

"You. Killed. Them." I said angrily as I looked up to the man I once trusted so much, his nearly black hair falling into his eyes just slightly. Even after all the shit he did, he still looked elegant.

"I protected you." He 'corrected' me, "Everythibg I do, I do for you. For us. You just don't understand yet."

"FOR ME?!" I screamed, I made an attempt to stand, but he pushed me back down, "You...ruined me. I should've pushed you away when I had the chance, Daniel."

He pressed his lips to my neck, "It's too late for that, Farris. You gave me your body and soul already, your mind is just distraught. You know you want to love me, you just can't let yourself. Even now, when I kiss you like I always have, you lean into me, just like you always have."

"I hate you." I finally said.

"No you don't." He laid more kisses to my neck, "If loving you is a crime, then I'm a criminal."

"You're a criminal for many other reasons, sicko." I spat.

"I don't really like that name," he cupped my face once again, "I prefer Danny." The psychotic asshole pressed his lips to mine with an unhinged desire, it was like a predator upping apart his prey, he bit at my lip, sucked, did everything he could. I tried my hardest to get away from him, but his strength was far greater than anything I could ever have, I could hardly even move.

"STOP! JUST STOP IT!" I said in between him destroying my lips.

"Farris, I love you more than anyone ever will. You belong to me." Danny's face was starting to show desperation.

"I'M NOT YOUR FUCKING PROPERTY! I NEVER ASKED FOR YOU TO COME INTO MY LIFE! LET ME THE HELL GO! GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM YOU MOTHER FUCKING MURDERER!" I snapped, I couldn't take this anymore, I tolerated it for so long.

I trusted him. I trusted him so much. I trusted him so much and loved him so much. I loved him so much I let him take me. I let the man who killed my friends, family, and everyone else take the one thing I can never get back.

I started to break down as I remembered how sweet and caring he was during that time, all the while-

"I CAN'T! LET ME GO! I'M NOT YOUR FUCK TOY! YOU CAN'T JUST KEEP ME HERE! I'M NOT YOURS!" I went off, all the emotions coming out in the form of water running down my face, "I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't."

"Farris, shhh, calm down. It's ok. I'm here." Danny squeezed my thigh, something I used to find comforting, not anymore, now it made me want to throw up.

"DON'T YOU DARE FUCKING TOUCH ME!" I shouted.

I looked to him, expecting to see a hurt expression, angry, patient, anything. But there wasn't anything. Danny looked completely numb to what was happening. It was only then I realized what I had said, and what he was capable of.

"Please don't... don't kill me." I said in a barley audible whisper.

He ran his hand through my hair, it was the most disgusting thing I've ever felt, "I would never. I love you. I love you more than you could ever know."

"I don't understand what I did to deserve this. I don't understand what I could've possibly done that was so bad to deserve this." I sobbed, "I know I'm not the best person, I've done more than my fair share of bad shit, but this? Isn't this too much?" I said to myself.

"Farris, you didn't do anything bad. Nothing at all. You're an angel to this hell. You're too good for this world." Danny said to me, his sweet voice could give someone a cavity.

"Please just leave me alone." I murmured.

"I-I.... okay." Danny finally gave in, he laid one last kiss to my lips before leaving the room, "I love you."

I collapsed onto the bed, probably the only thing I'd ever really see for the rest of my miserable life.

"Where are you at, God?"