It started with her

Chapter 1

Tuesday

I still remember how it started; I remember how the happiest girl in my class, the happiest girl in the entire school, started to show glimpses of her struggle. No one ever bothered her, no one dared to ruin her day, no matter how they acted towards others. She never showed any signs of weakness, all she did was smile. A smile that could warm up the most frozen of stone hearts, a smile that could reflect itself on your own lips, it was that contagious. She smiled to everyone, even the ones she didn't talk to, she believed that everyone deserves a smile no matter their history of actions. Some replied with a similar but less significant smirk, others scoffed or plainly nodded for a response, but I just stared. It wasn't often that she'd talk to me, even if she did it was mostly for a project. But when she talked, she finished with her bright smile and glanced into one's eyes, maintaining eye contact for a split second before refocusing on her assignment. All I could do was stare when she looked at me and gave me a heartwarming smile, I didn't know what to reply with whenever this occurred. She was one of the nicest girls, yet no one noticed when her behavior changed, but it was so gradual, like she had planned for it to be that way. Her eyes lost more of their shine for each day that went by, soon they were dull and barely responding to any looks she received. Her smile began to fade into nothingness, her replies were numb if they weren't plain silence. It seemed like no one noticed, but it was an act to maintain the mood that she had set, the only one who didn't notice was her best friend. All she ever did was talk nonsense while the girl sat quietly by her side, forced to listen to whatever was trendy as she promptly held back her tears from hitting the desk. Her movements were subtle and barely noticeable, but I saw it in an instant, yet I couldn't do anything, I couldn't get close to her. Though somehow this changed in a rather surprising turn.

I felt how I was dragged to her like a magnet. It felt like I was the only one to notice how her usually happy aura now had become moody and... depressive. No one else seemed to care about how she was feeling, she expressed no emotions towards anyone or anything, her face had become like a blank canvas, revealing nothing but empty space. Her eyes were dull, they didn't shine like they used to, her mouth barely moved, hiding her pearly whites, only speaking a few words quietly each time she replied. She didn't react to anything, she appeared insensitive, but she was struggling on the inside. During lunch I overheard her and her friend Ashley talking while they were waiting in line, but she didn't sound very interested, it sounded like she just wanted to get away from her friend. 

"Sooo... Two years left!" Ashley exclaimed, "how'd you feel?" She looked down at the floor, having her hood pulled over her head, she stood there completely quiet, almost like she was in a trance, "Emily? Helloo?" She tugged Emily's hoodie lightly to get an answer, as she snapped back, she looked around frantically as if she didn't recognize where she was.

"Huh...?"

"Jeez, you can't even try to engage in a conversation. I said two years left y'know, two years left of high school, then it's cute college boys and frat house parties!" She squealed as she did a few small jumps from side to side, Emily didn't look as eager with the whole meeting cute boys and going to frat house parties dream as Ashley was.

"I mean, I-"

"Doesn't your brother go to college? Is he still cute? Does he play any sport?" She interrupted her, then proceeded to lean in and whisper, "does he have a girlfriend?"

"H-How should I know? It's not like I text him every day, he has his own life, just... stop asking! Okay? You do this all time, as soon as you bring up anything related to college or... or him, you go all frantic and fangirly. You're really annoying when you do that!" Emily blurted out, she herself wasn't prepared for what came out of her. She avoided Ashley's shocked eyes as she took her tray with food and pulled her hoodie further over her head, covering her eyes, "I'm going to sit alone this lunch."