A Whole Lot Of Capitals - AKA The Potter Problem Project - Drarry

In Which Hermione Has a Plan

Harry might have found a solution to The Problem. This was what Hermione had taken to calling his love life, naturally. As was typical, she acted like the answer should have been obvious to him all along, even though it wasn't. Harry was also pretty convinced she never would have thought of it if the events leading up to the Idea hadn't happened exactly as they had.

Everything started when Hermione begged him to speak at the Fight Against War Orphan's Depression auction because she'd overbooked herself. He wasn't against helping out the charity, he'd started it himself — with Hermione of course — but no matter how many times he had to, he still hated public speaking.

The wizarding world would stand there sighing adoringly at every word that came out of his mouth and the press would criticise anything they could find wrong that wouldn't cause public outcry. It was, in a word, hell.

Truthfully speaking, Harry hated talking in front of anyone nowadays except his closest friends, who at this point included the very long list of Ron and Hermione. They'd both tried to help with The Problem before but the problem with their attempts to fix The Problem was that they always went about it the same way.

They'd set him up with a nice witch they knew from work, or Ron's fantasy Quidditch league, or that Hermione had met in line at the grocery store and tell her they had the perfect person for her. When that person was Harry Potter, though, it all went south. Even the possibility of finding someone had started to seem like it wasn't worth the effort when it came to the number of leaked interviews to the press and sobbing women on his doorstep when they realised he wasn't going to call back.

Harry was taller than average (if you included children), his eyes were nice (even if they were hidden behind his glasses), and other than his unfortunately untameable hair, he'd been told by both Hermione and Ginny that he was plenty fit. Logically, he should have a wide range of people to chose from. The only problem was, this group dwindled significantly when it came to what he wanted.

If they weren't Potter-Crazy, they were overly invested in Quidditch, or hated it, or were simperingly sweet, or thought his crup was annoying, or were Ginny. So despite what his aforementioned best friend and ex-girlfriend might think, he couldn't seem to find anyone worth more than a third date. He mostly blamed it on the You're Harry Potter Problem, not to be confused with the I'm Harry Potter Problem which had only come into existence recently after one of the worst dates of his life.

Ron and Hermione had introduced him to one of their friends from work. Maria was a sweet Medi-Witch with short brown hair and a gap tooth that had never been corrected. This became important later.

Hermione had told him, because she was worried it might be a problem, "She's really nice."

"What's wrong with nice?"

"Nothing. She's just... really nice."

She sounded perfect, Harry didn't have a problem with nice. Hermione could have been describing his dream girl.

They met at a curry place. Harry was always nervous going out in public but Maria had agreed to meet him at a muggle place and they got off to a great start.

Then the waiter brought the menus and Maria said, "I don't like curry."

Harry almost laughed at that because not all curry tasted the same and so surely there would be something she liked but he didn't and instead suggested she get one of the House salads which she did.

They talked briefly about their respective interests, but when Harry made jokes at his own expense she didn't take it well. So she wasn't one for teasing on a first date, that was no problem.