The Fantastic Drowse (Maylor)

The Sleepover

Roger grabbed his overnight bag and shoved some clean clothes in it, grinning widely.

"Rog, you're home?" Winifred frowned a bit, standing in the doorway.

"Yeah, Reid was being a right prick." Roger shrugged. "You know how it is."

"Should I call?" She asked, crossing her arms. She hated that damn principal.

"Nah, I took care of it." Roger grinned. "Is it alright if I stay over at Brian's tonight?"

"Honey, did you get suspended again?" She asked, cocking an eyebrow at him.

"How'd you know?" Roger smiled sheepishly.

"Your grandma called me. Somehow she remembered our phone number without grandads help." Winifred said, amusement in her eyes.

"Well, fuck." Roger sighed.

"Language. And something about you leaving school early and calling principal Reid a bitch multiple times?" Winifred said, fighting back a smile.

"Mother, I would never use that sort of language to a person of such authority." Roger said, making his voice slightly higher to feign innocence.

"Roger, you just said 'well, fuck' right to my face." She laughed. "You're not in trouble. I fucking hate that prick."

Roger laughed, shaking his head in surprise. "Language, mum!"

"It's true!" She laughed. "Invite Brian over for dinner this weekend. Your fathers going on a 'business trip' and Clare's going over Jessie's house."

"Business trip?" Roger frowned.

"He's meeting a whore in London." She shrugged, "So it'll be a nice weekend for us."

"Sorry, mum. I'll ask him. His parents are out of town." Roger said, regretting it as soon as it left his mouth.

"Oh? Parents out of town?" She smirked.

"Brian's not... we're not... it's just a sleepover. Like we always do!" Roger stammered, his face turning red.

"I didn't say anything." She continued smirking.

"Mum! Stop!" Roger covered his face.

"Do you have condoms?" She asked innocently.

"MUM! GOD!" Roger shrieked, grabbing a pillow to shove his face into.

"No, honey, it's just mom." She smirked. "Not god."

"Bloody hell." He sighed, trying to calm the redness of his face.

"But really, I'd rather you be safe than-"

"Mom. Please. I'm not going to... I don't... We aren't together." Roger huffed. It was true, they hadn't officially labeled anything and Roger had zero expectation of doing anything other than just hanging out with him tonight.

"Oh, alright. But if you do, wrap it before you tap it! Or rather, tell Brian to." Winifred shrugged.

"MOTHER!" Roger shrieked for what felt like the hundredth time that evening.

"I'm just saying, honey." Winifred smiled. "Have fun tonight. And stop calling everyone bitch, okay?" She kissed the top of his head before leaving him with his embarrassment.

"That was a bloody nightmare." He muttered. Sometimes his mum was a bit too happy for his feelings for Brian.

Looking at the time, Roger grabbed his bag and headed downstairs, quickly kissing his mother and messing his little sisters hair up. His father glared at as he walked to the door, Roger quickly flipped him the bird when he turned his back to him, earning a giggle from Clare.